Reasons why I should have had a heart attack today:

1) I get a letter from school informing me that they have not recieved a copy of some forms, so they were just politely informing me that I owe them just shy of 13 thousand dollars for the semester.

2) I was informed that I could not work (and thus not receive a paycheck) until the afforementioned forms were processed which will be a minimum of 2 weeks.

3) My school e-mail account was inexplicably shut down, and the campus computing center I.T. people had no idea why.

and last but certainly not least: 4) Upon my return home from learning about all three of the previous problems, I walk in to my bedroom to check my computer messages only to find that I had none...

I guess I should be more specific. There have been a great many times when I've walked in to check my messages and found that nobody had anything to say to me in my absence, this time was different though. The difference was that when I walked in and realized I had no messages it was because I had no computer. (Go back and read that last sentence again... go ahead, do it now... I'll wait.) Yeah. In the world of a college student who is used to having a computer, and with classes only four days away, if there's any justification for a heart attack, that's probably going to rank right up there at the top. So there I stood, looking at where my computer should have been and wasn't. I looked back on the counter, Jennie's old laptop was right where it had been, I went back to the back and saw that Jennie's office laptop and desktop computers were both in their normal places. There is no obvious damage to either door, televisions and any other items of value had not been touched, so now confusion sets in on top of panic. I call Jen to see if for some strange reason she'd come in while I was gone and taken my computer. I called her cell, got voicemail. I called her office, got voicemail. Called her cell again. SHIT. No answer. (I am literally shitting my pants at this point.) So I try to think... (please note I said tried to think, because it was a task that required some degree of effort and focus and was still mostly unsuccessful).

After about five minutes of trying to think about who else had a key to our apartment, and what reasoning could possibly explain why anyone would ever need to remove my computer, and what the hell I was going to do without it, I knew I had to wait until I'd heard from Jennie before calling the police and/or the landlord/maintenance man. It was about this time that a small hispanic man walked in through the back door of the apartment. He was strolling in like he lived here and saw me at which point we had the following exchange:

Liz: "Umm hello?"
Hispanic fellow: "OH! Hello!"
Liz: "Seeing as you have just keyed into my apartment, you wouldn't happen to know anything about a missing laptop computer, would you?"
Hispanic fellow: (Walking into my bedroom without really justifying his presence in my apartment) "Uhh, yeah, I have it... It's here, we had an emergency."
Liz: "Erm, well, is there a reason why you came into my apartment while I was gone and took it without my permission?"
Hispanic fellow: "Uhhh, you'd have to talk to Tom about that." (Hispanic fellow calls Tom the building maintenance man and tells him to come talk to me) "Tom said he'd be right down."
Liz: "Yeah, thanks... is that all?"
Hispanic fellow: "Yes, he'll be here soon. Goodbye."
[Hispanic fellow lets himself out the back door, and shortly thereafter Tom arrives.]
Tom: "Yeah, hi, sorry, we had an emergency and we needed a laptop, and since we'd recently worked on the hookups in your apartment, we knew you had one."
Liz: "You needed a laptop so you took mine without permission, and without giving me any kind of notice?"
Tom: "Yeah, sorry about that."
Liz: "Well that's all well and good, but in the meantime, I think I defacated on the floor and had a stroke."
Tom: "Yeah, you see it was an emergency, and I don't get paid to deal with the computers, (blah blah blah, poor excuse) and I'm sorry."

Yeah, so he apologized profusely, but that doesn't shore us up for the fact that I gonna need a pacemaker and a fresh pair of underwear to get things back to some semblance of normalcy. Oh yeah, and then there's the cursory, "I feel violated."

I must say that I'm pleased to announce that my Kyle has finally gotten a haircut. He is no longer on track to become the next Johnny Damon look-alike. He is back to being big and beautiful with a nice, closely cropped coif. Now the wedding can happen as planned. (I'd also like it noted that since my return to Chi-town my Cubbies are doing much better than while I was gone.)

Praise the gods of baseball!

Let's talk about my problems with alcohol...

1) I have a tendency to let alcohol open up the proverbial "emotional floodgates".

2) I tend to make out with boys when I drink. (Ok, this in itself isn't a problem, but I will say that I owe an apology to all those of you who have ever witnessed my public displays of affection and been offended by it)

3) I tend to drink too much, and before you know it, we've got all kinds of messy problems. (Open and repetitive apology to Alana for those nights.)

4) I tend to downplay those problems entirely too much.

5) Broken seal issues are never fun when you're between stops in your drunken escapade... (I know that Alana can sympathize with me here.)

That's just the top 5, and I am already seeing a pattern of personal humiliation... Does this mean I'm going to stop drinking? Is this the end of Lizzle's alcoholic adventures? Of course not!


So in my last post I promised a great entry and funny stuff... yeah... so I lied. I really don't have much of anything in the way of a funny post with amusing quotes, primarily because I got drunk and decided to sleep it off instead of going ahead and putting it up while it was fresh last night. I'm an asshole.

I will, however, share Ben's Las Vegas story...

Ben went to Vegas with certain expectations and pre-concieved notions... he was met with a real doozie of a reality check (Vegas style). So he's walking down the street and is propositioned by a prostitute (We'll call this first hooker Regina). (If I'm getting things in the right order, it was an offer of a "full-body massage") He turns Regina down and goes into a casino bar where he is propositioned by another hooker (We'll call this second prostitute Kathy). The first prostitute, Regina, is not entirely out of the picture just yet, she followed Ben into the bar, and witnessed the second proposition from our new friend Kathy. So our dear sweet little Benny turned down the Kathy as well, but being the nice guy that he is, he buys both Regina and Kathy a round of drinks. After a little conversation and another round, the first Regina had to use the restroom, so Ben was left alone with Kathy, at which time Kathy posed a very interesting question to Ben in an exchange that went something like this:
Kathy: "Um, you know that other hooker is a man, right?"
Ben: "What? No way! That's not a man!"
Kathy: "Yeah, she's totally a man."
Ben: "Really? I didn't think she was all that attractive as a woman, but now that I know it's a man... wow, I'm kind of impressed, I never would have guessed."
(Shortly thereafter, Regina, or should we say Reggie, returned.)
Reggie once again propostioned Ben, and once again, Ben turned Reggie down... although I feel safe in saying that this time Ben did it with a bit more conviction.
So when Reggie kept on trying to put the moves on Ben, Ben just came out with it... here's the exchange:
Reggie: "I think we could have a lot of fun together."
Ben: "No, I really don't think we would."
Reggie: "Sure we would!"
Ben: "Man, you're a dude! Aren't you?"
Reggie: (Flabberghasted) "Well, yes, but you never would have noticed"
Ben: "UHHH, I THINK I'D HAVE NOTICED THAT!"
Reggie: "No, you really wouldn't... [Reggie hikes up his/her skirt at the bar] Do you see anyhing?"
Ben: (Rather shocked) "Well... no." [pause] "Impressive tuck job, by the way."
Reggie: "Thanks. You want to buy me another drink?"
(Ben bought both Reggie and Kathy another drink and walked away alone, a little wiser and with a pretty great first-night-in-Vegas story.)

The next night Ben had his pocket picked, and while he did catch the perp, he didn't recover any of his money, so that put a significant damper on the rest of the trip.

So if you see Ben, you can give him a hard time, but go easy on him because we still love him.

That's all.

I curse internet shopping, and at the same time I love it. It brings me such joy and my bank account such pain...

Today Jen decided that she was reviving her blog, even though she doesn't find herself as a regular contributor on mine... although maybe once she gets cookin' on her own, maybe she'll be inspired to take up the slack she's left on the happy hour.... maybe not. We'll see.

Tonight was joyously spent celebrating Ben's 21st birthday... although a little later than originally planned. We went to Charlie's Ale House and had dinner and several rounds only before returning home to have more rounds, a small debate and a few tears... but all is good. We are probably better than ever in the land of lizzle. (I heard from spoolie, and the admiral, and that really rounded out the evening.)

Kirsten is planning a visit, for those of you who care.

I'll post a much funnier and more informative post and some really terriffic quotes later... when I've had less to drink and more to sleep.

Ok, so a fellow from NYC who I don't know commented on my blog... so I found out where his blog is and I gave it a quick look... I won't lie, I was quite entertained... although it does seem that he has a blog-superiority complex going on, even if all else he says touts of a severe inferiority complex. (Hey, I guess we all have to have one thing we're good at, don't we?) You kids can see for yourself and be entertained like me because he really is quite a talented prose writer... so be entertained by amusing phraseology and funny stories by following this fun little link!

Personally I think Dave would have a lot of fun hanging out with this character... they seem to have quite a bit in common. I also found his AIM screen name and chatted with him briefly this evening... I think he was trying to hit on me via the internet... he asked me what I was wearing... but I digress.

I must say that I do sincerely apologize to my few readers for the recent lack of alcohol-related hijinx... since I went home there was very little alcohol involved, thus not doing justice to the happy hour portion of the title here. But I'm back now, people missed me, and school is starting up again, so look for a return to the drunken fun and general debauchery that I've apparently become infamous for. What can I say? I love life. And I think it's amusing that I'm becomming notorious for my enjoyment! (Which only brings me further enjoyment.) But yeah... basically I'm looking forward to the return of "the adventures of quasi-alcoholic Lizzle, and her trusty sidekick Lana-mama-Spoolie-Stephansen" and you should too!

Oh, and in response to the NYC fellow's question and to explain the next couple of sentences, I wore a black tank top, a patterned black knee-length flouncy skirt, and a white mesh cardigan.
Based on this description, I looked decent today... I actually put forth a bit of effort. That said, I want to just say that I was cat-called, whistled at, hooted at, and generally ogled by dirty old men... I was cat-called a total of 9 times by my count, the most amusing was the Puerto Rican literally LEANED OUT THE WINDOW of his van WHILE DRIVING to holler "Aye Mamacita!" as well as some other spanish jibberish which I assume would have been offensive if I could have understood it. Do guys REALLY think this is an effective ploy to tempt women into speaking to them? Do they REALLY? I can't imagine what woman would ever find this tactic to be so effective as to strike up a conversation with the cat-caller, and I really don't see much of a strong relationship being based on any such meeting... But maybe that's just me. I should also note that I don't think that this cat-calling free-for-all was because I really looked all that great, I just think it's a reflection of the neighborhood in which I currently reside... I should also note that if I was still up in "The 26" (to be pronounced "the two six" referring to my old zip code, 60626) I have a feeling that the tally would have easily been double... because I'm moving up in the world. Similarly, if I lived in Lincoln Park, I'd have likely only heard one or two cat calls, most likely from homeless men sitting at the bus stops.

In the next couple days I will update the links, I promise. In the meantime, I think I'm gonna skedaddle.

QOTD for today is under yesterday's entry.

For ten straight evenings I've had my ass planted on the couch and my eyes glued to a perfect flat Trinitron. Not often does television make my heart race or my stomach churn, but as of late I feel cheated if I end a day having not paced in front of the television, screaming and pulling my hair out. The Olympics have taken over my life and I need help.

With that said I'd like to define the term "Diva" which has been used to describe one Svetlana Khorkina. Dave's definition is as follows

di-va n.
1.A bitch who, if not at the top of her game at present, was at one point extremely talented in one way or another.
2.An opera singer or something.

It should also be noted that a diva's area of expertise is always insignificant and useless. Yes i realize that music, the most common talent of the modern diva, is very important on a spiritual, cultural and individual level, but it must be noted that very little of the worlds most significant music was spawned of a modern diva. In fact I'd say none. Besides music is not the lone art. In short I'll bet my left nut that the woman who cures cancer(an accomplishment of true importance) will NOT be remembered as a diva. Got it?

Svetlana's performances on the vault, floor and beam were disappointing at best. I just wasn't impressed. She didn't sell any of her routines and lost major points for her lack of amplitude. Maybe I'm alone, but I think she was lucky to get silver. I did, however, shed an invisible tear for her, knowing that she would never have the individual gold. That tear soon found itself left behind and alone. My jaw dropped when "the diva" had the nerve to claim she was "robbed" of a gold medal because she's not American. I didn't mute the television when she stole the camera's from the true champion during a media conference after the event and I even smiled when she dramatically wrapped the Russian flag around herself before leaving it on the uneven bars. But to blame her second place finish on anything other than a lack luster performance is just too much. I hate her.

.....This was going to be a much better rant, but I was distracted men's high bar...... wow. I'll expand on my hatred of Svetlana later.

Ok, so I've been slacking, I've been back almost a whole day, and I've actually gotten very little done. I have not called Phil yet, I have not gotten my room all in order, I have not done any laundry, I am not unpacked, and I haven't gone to the grocery. I did however get cat-called by a skeezy Puerto Rican fellow... (something of the AYE MAMACITA persuasion)

Basically, I got home, I tried to get my room in some semblance of order... unsuccessfully. I went to dinner with Jen and Bret which was a virtual hotbed of quotes... and has firmly convinced me that Bret will be right there in hell with the rest of us. After dinner we worked on our computer problems for a bit, I put my new sheets on my bed (They are SPECTACULAR!) and we watched Euro-Trip before bedtime. So Jen went to bed, I talked to Alana for a bit and called it a night too. Here's the basic recap of my time at home:

I got home, I hung out with momma, the big bro, and the big bro's woman. Saw the little sis while she was in town to visit the big sis. Babysat the nephew for the big sis over the four week home stand. LAUGHED A LOT, because he is about 97% comedy, and visited with grandparents, and a few friends ... although not many, because I don't like most of the people I used to be tight with... Funny how that works... There was also a period of illness, a lot of spoiling at the hands of my mother, some olympic coverage viewing, momma's berfday-day, and a quick visit to see the poppage and company. It was a pretty good trip all around.

I'm not going to bore all of you with further details, but there were hilights and a few lows, but I had a good time, and I am glad to be back in Chicago... But if one more person asks me if I'm ready for school to start, I think I'm gonna snap... I've gotta go get some stuff done, so I'll post the quotes of the day that I'm behind on, and let that be the end of it.

QOTD
8.19.04 - "I've always taught my children to embrace the occurence of bodily functions... after all its natural, even if it's not always pleasant." ~My dad on speaking openly about "the slides"

8.20.04 - "Have you seen my baseball?" - My step-mom

8.21.04 - "Actually, I just wanna get it over with, I just wanna do it and be broken in." ~Alana

8.22.04 -
Jen: "Hey! Bret has 'Sex for Dummies' in his back seat!"
Liz: "Bret, are you a dummy when it comes to sex?"
Bret: "Wanna find out?"

8.23.04 - "Well, I wanted Jennie to come out with me to a movie, and she said she was going to do laundry, and since her grandma was living there, I told her to just make her grandma do it, I mean after all, what else does she have to do but wash Jennie's clothes and wait to die! And did Jennie come with me to see that movie, yes, I think she did!" ~Bret

8.24.04 -
Liz: "I think I'll take a shower and go to bed too..."
Jennie: "Dude, being clean is WAY over-rated."

8.25.05 - "Yeah, well, you'll be 4 months along with little Johnny." ~Leo on why I'll be getting married in a year

Hey kiddies, I'm at my dad's until Sunday evening... He has issues with anyone being on the computer for longer than 15 minutes or so, and I'm on about minute 25, so I will just post the quotes of the day when I get back to Chi-Town! You kids be good, and I"ll see you soon!

Be very proud of the Lizzle! Tuesday was VERY VERY productive!! I FINALLY finished the faith project, as well as my brother's painting... Now all I gotta do is sit and wait for the paint to dry. (And for the record that might take more time than I've got here!) So other than painting, I took care of some other business around here, went out to help Becky with Pampered Chef stuff, and helping out with the man... because doing both at the same time is quite a lot of work! I got home and announced to the neighborhood that today is my mommy's berfday-day! (HAPPY BERFDAY-DAY MOMMY!) And well, for me that's a pretty frickin productive day!

As for everything else, I'll bring you kids up to speed on the travel plans so that you're aware, because I know a few of you care about this sort of thing. So I'll be here for my mommy's berfday-day, and then Thursday morning I'm heading out to Louisville to see my dad, step-mom and little sister for a bit, and help Becky out with the man while we're there, and then I'll catch my flight to Chicago on Sunday. So for all those of you who have so desperately missed me, give me a call or a message on Sunday after 5 or so, and I should be in your neck of the woods to respond! And Monday I get to go in to work at the gym... oh how I've missed all the joys of the cage... actually, I've just missed the people, not so much on everything else. And next weekend (I think) Tarreck should be coming up to finance a fun time in the windy city for the Lizzle. After that, it's back to school time... BLECH! (Mentally insert the Mr. Yuck face here) I must say that after all the spoiling that my mom has done during my month at home, heading back to actual classes is gonna be a REALLY big reality check... One I'm NOT AT ALL looking forward to.

In other news, I still haven't seen my grandma, although I plan on doing that today. I still haven't talked to Dave, although he was supposed to call me. And I still don't really wanna see Lauren, although she's not very good at taking the BIG hints I'm droppin! (It's gotten so bad that she might actually stalk me all the way to Louisville just to hang out... Kinda weird if you ask me.)

QOTD (In honor of momma's berfday-day!)
8.18.04 - "It's not my birthday... I'm not having a birthay... Actually, you missed it... you were at Becky's so long that it's over"

Tonight's tot-wrangling session went remarkably well! Tyler was remarkably well-behaved, so that pretty much made today an all around awesome day all around. Momma continued her excessive spoiling today. We started off by doing lunch with the grandparents, then going for a pedicure. Then it was haircut time, just a little trim. We ran a couple errands, and then came home for a brief period of relaxation, and some Olympic viewing fun. Then it was off to tot-wrangle so that Becky and Ronnie could enjoy a pleasant child-less evening. This was fortunately not a problem, because like I said before, Tyler was incredibly well behaved. After I left, I gave Phil a call because I hadn't heard from him yet this week. I am pleased to report that he is doing MUCH better on the phone, and I think he's looking forward to my return. Possibly almost as much as momma is dreading my absence... Although I doubt anybody is looking forward to having me around as much as I know momma is gonna miss me! So I came home and watched some more olympic coverage with momma, and painted for a bit before composing this delightful entry and heading for bed! Nighty night!

QOTD
8.16.04 - "How INCREDIBLY misleading! It's just a single tiny nugget! I was expecting an EXPLOSION!" ~ Becky talking about Tyler's "nugget" which had been deceptively foul-smelling for the better part of a half an hour.

8.17.04 - "Yeah, he's funny like that, any time you fart, he'll reach up and touch your butt and ask 'Did you poop?' In fact, just the other night when I was rocking him to sleep, I farted and he just smelled it and he looked up at me, said, 'Mommy, did you poop?' and tried to reach around." ~ Becky on Tyler's fart detection prowess.

A special super-shout out to my momma!


Ok, so I'll admit it, I was WRONG! The other day when I talked about the terrible twos... I had no idea what I was talking about. The other day was a walk in the park. Tonight was the REAL definition of the TERRIBLE twos. Before was just your garden variety irritating kid stuff. Tonight was different. Every ten seconds there was something else, some new problem, something else that couldn't be solved without tears and screaming and ten minutes of whining. We were physically incapable of having mommy out of our sights, we dumped popcorn on the floor, and then cried when the dog started to come sniff and munch on it. I'll put it to you like this, I'm REALLY REALLY REALLY glad that I'm not a mommy yet, because if I were, I would also be a convicted felon who pulled a Susan Smith and drowned her children. I'm thrilled that at the end of the day I can pass him off to his mother and be done with it. GOD BLESS ALL THE GOOD MOTHERS OUT THERE! SERIOUSLY!

But today also had it's good points... in fact, it was a really awesome day up until babysitting time which was only from 4-8:30 PM. Why was it so awesome you ask? I got to sleep in, and my momma woke me up to tell me that we were "going on a quest"... I had no idea what the quest entailed, I was told to just blindly follow. So we got to the mall, and I got a pair of charcoal-grey pants, chocolate-brown pants, makeup, and we moved on. We grabbed some lunch at Shyler's and then went shoe shopping. I got some new running shoes for the impending school year, and momma was going to take me to the art supply store, but we figured that we would save that for tomorrow. She also informed me that tomorrow I would get my pedicure! YAAAAY! When we got home she then told me to go ahead and order myself some new undergarments! WOO HOO! Mommy is trying to spoil me rotten before I go back to school.... And I'm not complaining at all! I like being spoiled. My mommy is the best mommy ever... even when she's not spoiling me she's the best! (It's just THAT much better when she does get the chance to spoil me!) I love you mommy, thanks for not drowning me during my terrible twos!

Happy Olympic day!


Well those 4 and a half HORRID hours of tot-wrangling have worn this girl out. I'm going to bed... here's the quote of the day

Chi-town countdown: 7 days.



QOTD
8.15.04 -
Logan (The kid next door to Becky) : "Hey, I like your shirt!"
[Logan walks away]
Becky: "I don't know that he likes your shirt so much as what you've got IN your shirt."

Well. today was uneventful and unproductive... so here's the quote of the day for today and tomorrow.

QOTD-

8.13.04 ~ "Honestly, the thing I'm most worried about is that they'll get pissed that i'm kissing everyone and then no one will want to kiss me." ~Heather (That's a girl with her priorities in order!)

8.14.04 ~ "Well, he'll come home from work and ask me what I did all day, like I'm just sitting on my ass... but I've got it made while I'm pregnant, because he'll say, 'Jeez, Becky, what the hell did you do today?' and I'll just look at him and say, 'Gee honey, I grew ears today, what did you do?' and the fact is there just ain't a damn thing he can say to that." ~Becky on stumping her husband with her pregnancy productivity.

Tot wrangling started at 5:20 in the morning. That kid is an amazingly early riser. Exhausted doesn't really do justice to the feeling that has racked my body at this point.

I will say that I am very glad to see the new-found dialogue in the comment section! These little things amuse and please me so much!


QOTD
8.12.04 -
Ronnie: "What the hell are you watching?"
Liz: "Lord of the Rings... because there's nothing else on.
Ronnie: "Nothing? We get like 200 channels!"
Liz: "Nothing else, unless you want to watch the E! True Hollywood Story of Tonya Harding"
Ronnie: "Oh fuck that! I never thought I'd say this, but Lord of the Rings it is.... God bless daytime television."

Countdown to Chi-town: 10 days!

Well, today I was called in, as the babysitter-on-call has a tendency of doing. So I went to get the man at daycare, brought him home, fed him, played with him, watched a movie with him, played some more, bathed him, and got him to bed... All without inflicting serious bodily harm. Be impressed, because for the second half of that line-up, I remembered why they call it the TERRIBLE TWO'S. But more often than not he's a good boy, and to be quite honest, he's just too darn cute to beat senseless. I'll just say this, I'm glad I'm only an aunt, and that at the end of the day I can give him back, because I don't know how in the hell my sister does it. Or any mother for that matter. Mad props to all the mammas out there who didn't go loco on their kids... Because I guarantee that every mother out there has had a day or two when they totally understood why some wild animals eat their own young. I'm pulling the night shift here, so I've got a REALLY early wake up call in the morning. (Today he got up at 4:30) With that said, I'm taking my ass to bed!

QOTD
8.11.04 - "My mom is driving me nuts!" ~Murda (Kids, when she said this, she had been home LESS THAN 5 HOURS!)

Chi-town countdown~ 11 days.

I wanna give a quick shoutout to my soccer girls... Namely Alana, because I know that Hell-camp has come and I pity you all, and Alana, I am sorry that they won't let me come along and play with you kids... Actually, I guess I feel sorry for all you fall sports kids who are getting into the thick of training time! You know I love you, and I'll be in the cage when you get back to keep you all smelling fresh and looking good! (Lurk, the countdown has begun! I'll be back on Monday the 23rd, so run through the rules in your head, and get ready to lose your dignity!)

Dave, I'm still waiting on that phone call you promised me! (I'd hate to bother you at work, or interrupt your "special time" with your new lady-friend. Does she know you used to be a woman? You might want to bring her up to speed on that whole situation...

As for me, I'm feeling SO MUCH better... Still not 100%, but I'd say I'm at about 80% which is a vast improvement. Fortunately I have a wonderful momma who is willing to do anything within her means to make me feel better! She rocks! And I thank those of you who have sent get-well-wishes, because I appreciate them quite a lot. It means a lot to know that people care about my health!

I've been meaning to update the links on the blog... Some of them are pretty tired by now, I know, and I apologize for that! The thing is, if you kids want some new stuff up here, I'm gonna need a few contributions from y'all... Some suggestions for new funny stuff.

Oh, and speaking of funny stuff, tonight while I was at Walgreen's, I got the most ingenious toy ever created for less than 5 bucks! I'm not kidding... It's brilliant.

Well, I'm beat. Here's your quote of the day!

QOTD
8.10.04 -
Mike: "I think we need to address the fact that we never dated."
Liz: "I disagree."
Mike: "You disagree that we never dated? When did we date? Where was I? More importantly, was I any good?"



Countdown to Chicago: 12 days!

Drove down to N.C. this weekend for a Fisher Family Function (GF's grandmother's centennial birthday) and had a great time. Aaryn's clan is German and many flew into the states for the celebration and with them they brought beer. Cold. German. Beer. Mmmm. I took the opportunity to learn as much german as possible, but it was all lost to intoxication. No matter though, if i've learned anything in the past few years it's that EVERYONE, no matter their nation of origin, sounds the same after 14-17 drinks. Hooray beer!

North Carolina, on the other hand, sucked. Atleast the Burlington area near which we stayed did. Always ashamed to let a Saturday night go by without getting sloshed I drug Aaryn out to find the local watering hole. Applebees (however its spelled) was the only establishment we could find that sold alcohol in any form or fashion. This wasn't an option however, being that I won't drink at a restraunt bar (unless waiting for a table), hotel bar (unless waiting for a room) or an airport bar (unless... you've got the idea) because i've found the patrons to be pretty shady, depressing and very much the scum of the earth. The only cool thing I found in Burlington was a drive through liquor store. I've heard you guys have em in your part of the country, but there isn't a one in maryland. Dammit! It's genius! I bought two six packs and pack of smokes, not because i wanted to, but because i could. it was magic.

The best part of the trip was the drive. The new car runs great, handles like a dream and accelerates very well for a sedan. The leather seats, 12 disc changer, sun roof and tinted windows made it a very comfy ride. On the way back to baltimore I was tooling around with this turbo charged Neon for about 3 hours up route 85. We eventually hit real traffic and I thought I had lost him as he got boxed in pretty early, but to my surprise he showed up again 2 hours later at a McDonalds! Aaryn and I had pulled over for food and this guy walked right up to us and sat down. He intoduced himself as silver SRT Neon and asked if i drove a silver Grand Prix GTP. We talked about cars and such for about an hour while his gf and mine rolled their eyes. Had a great time. I got the car up to 120 mph on i95 before Aaryn started screaming. Girls are wierd.

I'm still a sick face. My throat hurts, my sinuses are killing me, my head is pounding, I can't breathe, and I've been exhausted for like 4 straight days... I'm putting up the quote of the day and calling it a night.

QOTD
8.9.04 - "Hey punkin, is there anything you want to do? Any place you want to go tonight?" ~Momma

(For those of you who don't get it, when she said it, it was about 7 PM Sunday night, in EVANSVILLE, IN... there is nothing to do, and no place to go after 5 on a Sunday in Evansville, IN.)

Lizzle has been a sick face lately. Friday night I was prepared for death... Saturday I felt a bit better, but still on the poopy end of the spectrum. Basically I'll say what I gotta say, and git-r-done.

Hooray for Greg Maddux! Way to go on the big 300!

Huzzah to my buddy Water-head! (Water-head knows who he/she is and why he/she is deserving of a huzzah!) You deserve it and you know it! You win!

And here it is, your quote of the day!

QOTD
8.8.04 -
Liz: "Well, I walked from Wrigley Field to my apartment..."
Lisa: "How far is that?"
Liz: "Oh I'd say about 3 miles or so."
Mom: "Well that's not so bad."
Liz: "IN HEELS!"
Mom & Lisa: (In unison) "OOOOH!"
Scoot: "I can't believe what I just heard! If I were to say there are starving babies in Afghanistan, I'd get no reaction... I hear 'I walked 3 miles in heels' and I hear 'OOOOOOH!!' from every other person in the room... I just can't believe it!"

Well whaddya know... I had to take a couple of days off from the blog, and a couple of my members took up the slack... That's the kind of thing I like to see! So here's a special shoutout to Jen and Dave for taking a little time for the entertainment of the masses!

But since I took a couple days off, I'll bring you kids up to speed. Basically. I had another one of my personal epiphanies, this time it's about societal perception of love and sex... I won't bore all of you with the minute details, but I'll just say that I think it's a good thing that I had this kind of moment of clarity now. The timing on these things is just incredible!

Outside of all that, I'd say that while my homecoming has a bit lack-luster in most regards, but the time spent with the family, and the babysitting job have both been awesome! Basically my sister Becky pays me to play with my nephew, and to keep her company! I love this job! Also I have gotten to spend some time with my mom and my brother. We've had some quality margarita nights, and some video game amusement. Becky and I have had good lunches, and "Sex and the City" mini-marathons... GOOD TIMES!

The other day Tyler accidentally gave me a kick to the jaw, but that's one of the hazards of the job... I'll live!

OH! And before I finish this off, I've got 2 things to say...
1) Jen, my AC better be in my room when I get back!
2) Just when everybody thought the Jesus bed couldn't get any better, IT HAS! I made a luxury-item purchase... 350 thread count Jacqard Sateen sheets.... I'M NEVER GETTING OUT OF BED TO GO TO CLASS... EVER!

Here are the quotes of the day that I owe you!

QOTD
8.3.04 - "Sex is like cuddling... Only damper" ~Quote from Becky Adams' AIM profile.

8.4.04 - "Well... Peter Pan is hot!" ~Alana talking about Peter Pan... I don't know why.

8.5.04 -
Liz: "Karla can lick my big toe!"
Alana: "Nothin' like a good toe lickin'!"
(I was saying that Karla would just have to wait, and Alana was enthusiastically agreeing!)

8.6.04 -
James: "Well, I'll give you a choice, I can either talk bad about your mom or your baseball team"
Liz: "You don't want to do either one, because either way you're lying... I mean you talk about my mom, and you're going to hell, and I'll have to kick your ass, and if you talk about my Cubs, I'll talk back, and you'll look bad because your baseball knowledge will be shown up by a girl.
James: "Damn, either way you've got my manhood and I lose..."
Liz: "Admit it, you like it when I have your manhood."
James: "Well, I've offered my manhood, but you don't want that... You just take my dignity."

8.7.04 - (We were playing a video game where he had to save little Chinese people from a burning building)
Mom: "Oh! Catch him! Save that one!"
Bill: "Yeah, let's save all those little yellow babies!"
Liz: "You know you're going to hell for saying that, right?"
Bill: "Yeah, I pretty well figured as much a long time ago."

I got a new-to-me car yesterday and I'm lovin it! Check it out. She needs a name though. Any ideas?

So my pumpkin is sad that no one writes. I understand, yet I've even abbandoned my own blog life. It's hard cause no matter how hard i try i can't be nearly as cool as Liz and remember all the little daily details and bloggable info.

My liz has been gone for over a week now. It is sad. Sometimes I just open her door and stare at her bed and take her life size body pillow that no one knows what she really does with it in that bed and hold it soo close. Ewww...that sounds freaky. Nope but i do miss myself some liz roomie fun and look forward to the return date of my roomie. Until then I stole the AC unit out of her room two nights ago when it was 90 out and thought i might die if i had to stand in the kitchen for 4 minutes waiting for the microwave. he he. I am a WIMP. I melt. I know this so its ok.

Ok...I'm rambling, but ramble or no ramble i BLOGGED just for you!

Hugs and love,
Your Mouse

Tyler is a living, breathing, walking, talking ball of comedy. Here are a couple of examples:
I was giving him a bath tonight, and he was sitting there and just out of the blue he farted.... he turned and looked at me with this big grin on his face and goes, "What was that?" and with a straight face I tried to say, "I don't know... what was that?" and he goes "It was me! I pooted." There is something to be said for TOTAL honesty...

And the other night we had put him to bed, and like an hour later he stealthily crept down to the living room and I didn't even see or hear him until he was 2 feet from the couch, and he turned and looked at me with the biggest grin on his face... like he knew he wasn't supposed to be there and he turned to Becky and looked her dead in the eye, and said "Hi, mommy! Can we watch Hairy Monsters?" Which just goes to show you, even an hour after he was supposedly asleep, we still needed to expect the unexpected.


I've got some quotes of the day to post, but I'll do that later, because I gotta go to bed NOW, due to the fact that I've gotta tot-wrangle EARLY tomorrow.

So theLizzle wants more participation. Fair enough.

OMG I need a break from life! It's been soooo busy. This weekend was spent with Aaryn and much like last weekend there was not much sleep had, but fun aplenty. Friday night my group went to a small bar on the westside of Baltimore called Ottobar (or autobar or ottoSPACEbar... there may be an umlaut in there somewhere) . I've never seen so much black lipstick in all my life. Ottobar is where Goth kids from high school go to die. It was all very sad, but I've never been one to chalk up an evening, so i took the chance to learn more about the goth/punk persuasion. I was all like Jane Goodall or Dian Fossey and shit. I found the easiest way to earn the acceptance of the pack was to first gain the respect of the alpha males (the ones wearing the most black, with the most tattoos and the most piercing). This was harder than anticipated and I quickly learned that a single tattoo does not carry much street cred and that Modest Mouse isn't as underground as they used to be. What did work? Girly drinks. It seems that outsiders are most often given away by the cheap american beer in his or her hand. This was corrected with a rum'n'coke. Secondly I had to do something about my appearance. I looked far too respectable and stood out like a clean thumb. This was addressed by unfolding my collar, rolling up my sleeves as far as possible and dishevelling my hair. After that all I had to do was stand atop the bar and scream "Coldplay sucks! Long live The Pixies!" and I soon found myself invited into "the inner circle" which i found to be more of a triangle (me and two guys = triangle != circle). The only thing I brought home from the whole experience was a hangover and the word "Emo" which I've no idea the definition. Emo must be of an asian dialect because no one can tell me what it means exactly, only kindas and sortas. Some ass told me it stood for emotion or emotional, but thats too retarded to be true.

Saturday I went to a farm fair in north-eastern maryland which was more fun than I expected it to be. Aaryn was defiantly out of her element but was quite the trooper. Today i tore down the outboard from my boat for scrap. I had decided to get rid of it (where “get rid of” = "hide it in dad's shed") but a friend of mine said he would buy the powerhead from me and I desperately need the cash. So after removing the salvageable I went at the drive shaft and lower unit with a sledge hammer and blow torch. This was much fun.

In short I was "doing something" constantly this weekend, as i have the past few. I'm getting tired of "doing stuff" and need some "me time" or "lounging around" very badly. Unfortunately I don't see any of that in my near future. Next friday i'm off work to spend the day in delaware with my family (yay :(… Delaware is not the magical land you imagine it to be) then leaving for North Carolina that evening to spend the weekend with Aaryn's family. Sheesh.

Lastly... Michael Moore is an ass.

<>Love,
DJ Pan Blanco

Uhh, yeah, so we got Nomar.


Good times.

Well, I spent my day in a leisurely way... Got up LATE, went shopping with momma, did lunch, ran a couple errands, watched season one of Sex and the City, and talked to a few people before composing the daily blog entry. After talking to my mom about the newest blog members, she posed an interesting question: What does someone have to do to be a member? Very good question Miss Becky. Very good question indeed...

So that got me thinking. I talk to almost all my members on a regular basis, so I know it's not like they've fallen off the face of the earth. And I understand that you kids are VERY busy folks with wonderfully rich and meaningful lives, but here's the thing... I started this thing as an outlet for me to entertain others, and I invited others into the process so that I could also be entertained. (And while I will admit that I do get a great deal of entertainment from the comments I get from my regular readers, and I admit that a few people who I've been introduced to at parties and whatnot who have said "Oh, you're the girl who writes up Liz's Fun Time Happy Hour... I love that! My friend showed me, and it's so funny, I read it every day!" which I do find a little flattering and a little weird... Only because people who have never met me are keeping tabs on me daily, but I digress.)

So anyway, I ask myself, what am I requiring of my contributors? The fact is that I originally placed no constraints on how much or how little my friends and co-conspirators would put in, because I wanted this to be a fun, laid-back thing that people enjoyed reading and jointly PARTICIPATING in! So here's the thing... I looked at the situation with my poor dear Dave. If Dave can find the time to read my recent mangle of thoughts, and compose an entry in spite of all his assorted family drama, surely my other members can pry themselves away from their business for 5 minutes to drop a line or two on the blog, right? I mean, I'm not asking for a once-a-day commitment or anything. Hell if I were to get one entry a week from all the people who have been invited to publish posts, I'd be tickled pink... I'd be beside myself! But the fact is that I don't expect that now either. (But I don't think that between 5 and 15 minutes a week would be too much to ask...) At this point I'll say that I'll take whatever I can get, but that's only because I know a lot of my contributors don't have access to cable internet during the summer, and I don't wish dial-up internet usage on anyone! But once summer ends, I'm putting the smack down kids! Believe it!

I don't want this turning into a full-on rant, so I'll just quit while I'm ahead. Wear a lifejacket when boating or participating in other watersports, always swim with a buddy, and enjoy the quote of the day!

QOTD
8.2.04 - "I hate you and your choco-cremes! But my ass thanks you, because it was just telling me the other day that it needed something else to hold onto!" ~ Becky

(Oh, and for those of you who don't know what choco-cremes are, you're missing out on a thin slice of heaven, so come to the Ville and give them a try sometime!)

The Admiral is back... I've made arrangements for Kirsten to contribute once she is back online and in communications. So we welcome another new member to the blog... Even though we know she won't contribute for a little while. Meanwhile we anticipate the introduction of an Evansville contingent, Miss Brittany Griggs! She should be joining us within the next week or so and enlightening us with her entries from the Ville and all the joys of USI! Special-Griggs is joining the happy hour because she is considering starting her own blog to keep herself occupied in her typical Evansville boredom, and she wanted to get her feet wet here. I know you kids will just love her, because she rocks.

I talked to Phil, he's still beat from his trip to Vegas, (because he did it right) and based on the specific viewing of all the phone calls, I just gotta say that this poor guy just has to have the worst phone-call-timing EVER. I mean really. He called during VERY tense moments in sporting events, he called when I was trying to wrangle a 2 year old and a 100 lb dog, there were other instances too, but you get the picture! If he wasn't so sweet, we might have a problem here, but he's just as endearing as he can be.

As for Thursday evening, things went well, dinner at O'Charlie's is never bad, tot wrangling went pretty well, and I have no real complaints... I should go ahead and post the most amusing exchange I had with my sister today:

Becky: Jessica, go watch him.
Jessica: What? Nobody else cares anymore?
Liz and Becky: Nope.
Liz: He's replaceable! Eh, you've got another one on the way, nobody will even notice he's gone.
Becky: I would... I'd get more sleep!

As far as everything else goes, I'll go ahead and give a shoutout to C-Murda, because I can! She's my girl!

Look both ways before crossing the street, and enjoy they quote of the day!

QOTD
8.1.04 - "OH, it's so weird that you show up now! We totally had a Scheller moment a couple hours ago... That fuckin' hearse pulled up next door again! And I said 'Is that a fuckin hearse?' and here you are, just a couple hours later!" ~Momma Griggs

Hey, everybody... let's give our newest member a warm welcome!

Welcome to the program LuRK!!!!
(that's Leo to you other folks)

and in other news, it's Feeney's birthday!!

Happy Birthday Emily Feeney!

 

Well a fine, good morning to you my friend!
I think it's official. Not only am I turning into one of those girls I hate, I'm also going to hell again. (The latter is not a direct result of the former, but both are bad, and they both warranted mentioning.)
So what makes me think that I'm turning into one of those girls I hate? Well only a few people are going to hear all about that one... the people who I trust to love me anyway, in spite of my slow decent into loathesomeness.
As for me going to hell, Ben and I discussed it, and the fact is that while I am bound to be in really good company, I am still rather upset about going to hell. It's going to happen, and not because of something as innocuous as calling my mother a Lep, or joking with Murda about a guy with one leg. No, it's much worse. This has pretty much cemented my place in hell, right next to Stalin and my philosophy professor Dr. Seigfried. It's just a reality I've come to terms with. (Murda, DO expect a phone call about all of this.)
Fortunately there are some things that have gone quite well.I got my new phone yesterday, a day earlier than expected, (which is saying a lot for the fine people at UPS and Nokia).
I have plans to go to lunch and a movie with my mom, because she has the later half of the day off, and that rocks.
After that I have plans to go out and hang with my sister and the man (My nephew is the man!) and go to dinner with them because my step-mom will be in town.
I hope this brings all you kids up to speed, I know a few of you Chicagoans are keeping tabs on me via the blog, so that's the itenerary for today.
Maybe a night out with Special-Griggs is in order... we'll see!
Don't run with scissors, and I'll catch you on the flipside!

Well kids, here's the latest scoop.

Jennie is big-pimpin in Chicago while I'm away. She misses me, but her harem of men has been keeping her busy in my absence.

I'm finally getting my new phone tomorrow, which means that I will be able to call people with the number 8 in their phone numbers once again!

Lunch with Becky was GOOOOOOD. Never underestimate the value of time and money spent at Red Lobster!

Margarita night with mom was not good, because I was forced to listen to her co-worker bitch and moan about how awful her life is. LAME-O! I thought the margaritas were good until I realized that the mix was way too sweet and it made my tummy hurt. I went to bed early.

I also spent part of yesterday visiting with the A.O. crew. They love me, they miss me, I'm still glad I didn't return this year, and all is right with the world. Even going on my very VERY limited time there this summer, I'm going to go out on a limb and say that this will be Ethan's last year. I think he's gotten a little too fed up with the bullshit downtown, and in typical Evansville Parks and Recreation fashion, they have run off another of their best workers. Lock-dog will most likely also be done after this year... 7 years is a long time. No shame in hanging up the whistle now. I'll still have to stop out at Lloyd pool, visit the whipper-snappers out there.

I still haven't called Shannon, even though like 8 people have asked me about it. I'll probably do that sometime this weekend. I'll also have to paint some this weekend... I really gotta wrap up the Faith project, and send it on it's way. (I know it would be appreciated no matter when it arrives, but I think the sooner it's done the better) (And by the way, the people at the airport LOVED it.) Well, I gotta get moving, so I'll check back in with all you kids later on! BE GOOD!

QOTD  (In honor of my return to the A.O.)
7.29.04 - "Scheller, you know, after last year, I never thought I'd say this, but man... I miss you! And to be quite honest I wish we'd have gotten you back this year! It has sucked without you!" ~ Ethan Browning

7.30.04 - "This summer has sucked without you! Scheller, we need you back... We needed you for cross-words... They're really hard without you here!" ~ Special-Griggs!

7.31.04 - "I broke a guy's nose! I broke a guy's nose playing volleyball, and my team said the hit looked really good too!" ~ Special-Griggs

I'm sorry Liz. I just haven't been infront of the computer much the last couple weeks. Here's an update for you.

-Met a girl. her name is Aaryn (wierd). She must be cool cause i spent 48 straight hours with her and we didn't try to kill each other. I'm afraid i'm just using her as a security blanket... haven't had the time/energy to contemplate though

-Grandfather is dieing. He's down to 120 pounds and is unable to talk. I'm dealing with it well, but the family is taking it really hard. My grandmother is his second wife so there are two families fighting over control of the situation. It's tough, I've been on the edge of tears for so long now. That's life though huh

-switched to the day shift at work. which is cool, but there is so much to do. I can't get much time to myself and i'm pooped by the time i get home. It's kinda scary cause i don't know everything i need to to do the job well, so I'm becoming a thorn to the people around me. Luckily I learn quickly.

-Friends from the past have recently come back into my life. Which is cool. A buddy I hadn't talked to in 3 years invited me out a couple weeks ago and we've been going to gym together ever since. He's the only person of real importance, but I've talked to 4 other people I hadn't seen since high school in as many weeks. Through these contacts I've found many bars i didn't even know existed. Hooray beer!

-Went through 1600 bucks last time i was in NYC(3 or 4 weeks ago) and still haven't recovered. So my diet has been downgraded to beer and raman only. I've found it a great way to loose weight though and have dropped to just under 200 pounds. I'm pretty sure that's a healthy weight for someone of my height (6'2" or 3").

-Lastly, while all this is going on I've been playing referee in some twisted game of wits inwhich there are three teams: Mom, Dad and brother. My brother decided he'd rather live with mom than suffer through his teen years with dad. Dad is hurt, as he should be, and has taken an aggressive approach to the situation. Mom has been forced into playing an aggressive defense and neither will talk to the other at this point. My brother has been chastised by everyone 'cause he spent the entire summer sitting on his butt instead of finding a job. Of course i'm the only person who hasn't pissed anyone off so i'm forced to pass messages and pacify egos.

I don't know. I guess everyone has things like this going on in their lives. I'm dealing as well as I can, just feel spread kinda thin. I'll call ya chica.

Well, for those of you who have been keeping tabs on little Faith, (who you might know as the reason for the Faith project,) she has passed on. After 7 and a half weeks of bringing joy into the lives of everyone who ever knew her or heard about her, little Faith has left us. We are grateful for the time we did get because it was so much more than we had ever originally hoped for. I want to take this opportunity to thank everyone for all your thoughts and prayers, as they are greatly appreciated. The bright point of light in all of this is that we've got another person on our team up there, just one more person looking out for us.

****Faith Anne Messina ~ 6.1.04 - 7.25.04****
 
On a lighter note, I want to congratulate Ben on FINALLY turning 21! Way to go Ben! You made it! Now we can party out on the town with you, instead of keeping it in the confines of our places of residence!

As far as the rest of my homecoming has gone, I'm still pretty happy about being here. Within 10 minutes of my arrival in town I ran into a guy who I briefly dated last summer, and a guy who I worked with three years ago (he sucked at life almost as much as he sucked at lifeguarding, so we made him cry and eventually he called it quits... No loss). I gave Lauren a call, (I don't know why...) and her birthday celebration is this weekend but I will not be able to attend because it's up at the cabins and I'm too poor to finance the necessary liquor purchases and gas for the trip. I ran into coach Lensing (HS soccer) at the grocery store, and I remembered why I never liked her.  All that aside, I had a pretty mundane first full day back in the Ville... Got up, ran errands, dental appointment, lunch, more errands, visit with sisters and the man, dinner, and some whatnot... You know. Nothing special. Tomorrow holds a lot of promise though, because I've got lunch with Becky and margarita night with my mom. Fun times.

I guess I should go ahead and note that free laundry rocks, and that dial-up internet service makes me want to kill myself. And I still miss my Dave! (Dave, call me when you get a chance hun. I never know when to call you anymore because you keep changing up the schedule!)

QOTD
7.28.04 - (talking with Becky about the bun in the oven)
Liz: Well, what do you want?
Becky : [very quickly, and very sure] GIRL! Er, um... I mean it doesn't matter, as long as it's healthy.

OK, so here it is… THE LONG-AWAITED COLUMBIA RANT! (And like I said before, this entry is not in any way shape or form an attack on my former-roommates, so if that's what you're looking for, just don't even waste your time.)

Let's start at the beginning shall we? Early last June Emily and I left our respective homes to come up to the city and find some new digs! So we looked at a bunch of ads, we talked to an apartment finder service, and we happened across an ad hanging on a doorpost. We found the address listed and took a look. It was nice, or so we thought.  Late last July moving day rolled around, and the apartment looked exactly the same as the day we looked at it before. Meaning the place had not been cleaned. And by that, I don't mean that it had been given a once over so that it at least met minimally livable conditions ... NO. While the landlady had told us that the carpets had been cleaned, amazingly we still managed to fill an entire full-size vacuum bag with all the crap still on the floors the first time we vacuumed. Funny, usually when someone has the carpets cleaned professionally all that crap gets picked up, not left for the tenants to pick up with a normal vacuum. Sarah (the landlady) also mentioned that the whole place had been re-painted before our move-in date. Once again this is very amusing because there were stains from a beverage that had been splashed or something on the walls and ceiling of the front room.

Since we're on the topic of the front room (for those of you familiar with the layout this became known as the sunroom, the blue room, or my studio) Other problems with the front room included baseboards so filthy that my mom and I had to scrub them with a toothbrush, and they were still NASTY. Not to mention the screens that were on the windows, that is, if you can call those screens. The windows that actually had screens on them had screens that had so many slices and holes in them that they might as well not have even been there. Screens are usually in the windows to keep dirt and bugs and the like outside… well we'll get to the bug problem in a minute, but let's just say I was less afraid of ANY bug that could have flown in my window than those already dwelling in the apartment. But I digress, back to the windows and screens. Throughout the apartment, the majority of the windows did not stay open on their own. Instead they had to be propped open with a large assortment of items, from fans, to other screens, to pieces of wood, to phone books and pens. This was not the only problem with the windows... I should mention that in several of the windows there was a large collection of cigarette butts, pennies, garbage, candy wrappers, and other assorted filth that had no business there if someone had supposedly cleaned before we moved in.

Moving on back to the living room we'll address the most significant of problems that seemed to get its start here. BUGS! And when I say bugs, I don't mean we had an ant problem or even cockroaches... Cockroaches I could have dealt with, but no, instead we had something that was a cross between the nastiest, creepiest, and crawliest of bugs... It was what appeared to be half silverfish and half centipede.  Now admittedly, as far as girls go, I'm not the most feminine or girly, but the sight of one of these things crawling on the wall, or ceiling, or floor was enough to make me squeal, and get on top of a table in terror. Unfortunately my roommates were apparently even more terrified because I usually had to "be the man" and take care of it. My skin is crawling now, just thinking about these suckers, so let's move on.

I suppose that since we're on the topic of pests, I should mention that for a brief time we also had mice... It's not really a fun thing to be sitting on your floor, and catch a glimpse of something moving only to find on closer inspection that it is, in fact, a small grey rodent winking at you. These are not the kinds of little friends I want in my place of residence. 

My room is next in line, so let's just go there. I'm going to pretend that I didn't know it was an easy little walk for the critters who made their home in the living room, because I only ever saw one or two in my room, and that was only at the height of their existence when they were in EVERY room on occasion. My room wasn't really supposed to be a bedroom, it was originally planned as a dining room, but once I had curtains up it wasn't so bad as a bedroom. I actually rather liked having it up in the front because it afforded me privacy and space that the spare room (the tiny room that should have been my room) could not. My only real beef with my room was less with the location of my room, and more with the location of our building. But since this was a problem I experienced most often in my bedroom I'll go ahead and place it here. My room was located on the east wall of the apartment building, and this means that it abutted an alley which was frequented not only by the normal traffic of cars, but also by thugs looking for a fight, drunks looking for a place to pee, and the assortment of neighborhood bums… but all these things are a part of living in the two - six, so these were the least of my problems. The real problem came around between 6 and 7 AM on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays. Yes, that's right; the garbage men don't care if you're a snoozing college student who has just pulled an all-nighter to get your lab results and your research project in APA format for your 9 am class, or if you're trying to sleep off your hangover from last night's drinking binge, they just care about dumping that dumpster, and doing it in the loudest and longest possible way. After enough of this, we not-so-much-morning-people seriously consider homicide as a very serious option. Unfortunately the knowledge that the garbage company would just send another truck with more guys makes this a less-than-practical option to start the homicide for beginners program. Other than that, my room was pretty sweet.

Up next is the kitchen. Our green tiled kitchen that had tiles coming off the walls, a linoleum tile floor that had been blackened from lack of cleaning, an oven vent that very obviously had been CHEAPLY replaced with a vent that did not fit the intended space, a garbage disposal that despite being "fixed" three times worked for a grand total of about a week the whole time we lived there, and assured us of having only one properly functioning/draining side of the sink... Obviously we were making great strides at quality in the kitchen. The fridge was ok until the start of August, but rather quickly declined in functioning thereafter. And so the landlady came twice to have it "fixed" as well, but when it's the middle of summer in the city, in an apartment with no air conditioning, and the fridge and freezer are consistently as warm and stale as the inside of the dishwasher, we got a little tired of having to wait for a repairman. Eventually, after a few attempts at repairing the old crap-hatch fridge, and once all our food had spoiled, and Emily's insulin became questionable we asked for a replacement. We got one.

 Next came the room that was originally intended to be my room. The tiny spare room was just that, tiny. We never really used it for anything other than storage, so no real problems there. Moving on down the line... We head to the bathroom.

 The pink bathroom was such a joy to all of you who experienced it, wasn't it? For those of you who didn't ever have the pleasure of seeing it for yourself, it was a tiled wonder, roughly the shade of pepto-bismol. Toilet function was fine, sink function was fine, so the regular temporary daily guests never got the full understanding of the joys of the pink bathroom. Those who had any extended stay started to understand. But only living there can make it fully rant-worthy.  From the day I moved in until the day I moved out we told Sarah (landlady) about the tiles coming off the wall in the shower. For those of you who  A) did not see this particular case for yourself, or B) don't know anything about tiles in showers, this problem could have been easily solved with a little bit of silicone caulk if it had been taken care of right off the bat. And like I said, on move-in day I could see this being a problem, so I went ahead and mentioned it to Sarah to try to nip it in the bud before it became a bigger problem, but she didn't bother to fix it when it was easy, water seeped into the cracks and the wall rotted away to nothing, and the tiles fell off to reveal a big nasty black hole. Of course, when I called to tell Sarah about this, it wasn't fixed right then either. It took her a couple of weeks to get back to me and then she just decided to put up a shower curtain on the window side to prevent more water from getting in the hole in the wall. Three months later, when it was time to move out, the hole was still there, but it was no longer our problem. On more than one occasion we had to call in the plumber because taking a shower meant that the water you were showering with would turn into a bath for your feet and ankles, often right up to your mid calves. This doesn't seem so bad on the face of things, but when that water SLOWLY drains away, you are left with the nastiest layer of scum and filth on the sides and bottom of the tub that you can imagine… You don't realize just how grubby you are until your shower drain stops working.

As far as the two back bedrooms, the adjoining room and the other bathroom, I can't really comment on them because I was never back there. (That was pretty much exclusively the roommates' domain, so I didn't spend much, if any, time back there.)

So there you have it, the Columbia Rant. I hope it lived up to all your expectations, and I'm sorry if you guys think I left something out... If I left anything out, anything about the apartment itself that I bitched to my readers and friends about, just let me know, and I'll write up any necessary amendments. Otherwise, I think this rather lengthy entry about covers it... Damn near 2,000 words on the matter.

As far as the new place goes, just about all the very small kinks ironed out. The dishwasher is fixed, the walls were painted the day after we moved in, the tiles in the bathroom were replaced, and now all we have to deal with is the occasional hiccup with the building's internet network, and the way that our kitchen sink has been a little off since we got the dishwasher fixed.

That's that. So here's the quote of the day:
QOTD
7.25.04 - "Can you imagine passionately moaning 'Oh, Larry'?" ~Jennifer talking about Larry.

7.26.04 - "Bring me your groin!" ~Chris (fortunately she's a trainer!)

7.27.04 - "Where did you find this boy, a magical treasure chest?" ~ Kirsten

Yeah... I'm not going to lie. I was really not seeing this Phil thing panning out. Before the date even began, I was actually trying to figure out ways to bail early if my hunch proved correct. But I made the decision to go ahead and give it a shot because there was nothing for me to lose by going... Fortunately for all parties, my hunch was wrong, and instead of counting down the minutes and seconds until it was over, I had a great date! Phil was nervous and charming, and brought me roses. He was very sweet and polite. And basically I had a terriffic time! 

I know a few of you have gotten all of the details of the evening... and I'm sorry if I bored you girls with what I considered the highlights of what I considered to be a great date, but I was overdue, so I was dying to share!

So that's the short version.

As for today, I got up, got my nails done, ran around with C for a bit, we watched the game (cubs win), and painted a bit. Phil gave me a cursory day-after-date call, thus sealing his place in the Lizzle good date hall of fame. I think I'm going to go ahead and put up the quotes of the day, and stop boring you kids with this nonsense!

QOTD
7.21.04 - "Yeah, well, I mooned the easter bunny." ~ Phil

7.22.04 - (I'm going to double up on the days because we were quoting the lines while watching Top Gun) "I feel the need... the need for speed!"  and "Never leave your wingman!"- C

7.23.04 -
Liz: "You can be my wingman anytime!"
C: "You can be mine!"

7.24.04 -
Liz: "This is what we train for!"
C: Yeah, I'm going to have to use that one on my team at our last game... aww hell, I'll probably use it at the first game!

There are a lot of things that really confuse me. Boys for example. They are by far the top on my list of confusing things. They claim to be such simple creatures, but nothing could be further from the truth. Take for example the fact that for a little while now, I was in a personal drought where I couldn't get a decent looking guy to even look in my general direction, but now all of a sudden I've got boys out the wazoo. I don't get how I'm repulsive for so long and all of a sudden I've got like 5 guys vying for my attention. And doesn't it just figure that I hit a good stride less than a week before I'm due to go home for an extended period of time? I think that's just my luck. I don't know what I'm supposed to do with that.
 
Another thing that confuses me is how to deal with an insult when it comes from someone who is supposed to be my friend. (I'm sure that she'll read this, so I'm not even going to try and dance around the name) I was actually quite insulted when Rachel called me this evening to find out about the finish of the Cubs game. I was not offended that she called, but when the conversation turned to her having to work in the morning, she called me a "lazy-ass" and I resent that quite a lot. I understand that Rachel has two jobs right now, and that I'm not working at this particular moment (Because I CHOSE to take a week off before going home,) but she called me a LAZY ASS! And I'm not gonna lie, that kinda pissed me off. And while I only took exception to it while we were on the phone, the more I thought about it, the more upset it made me. Maybe it's just me. I don't know.
 
Anyway, I've supposedly got a date with Phil tomorrow, and I'm also supposed to see Alana late in the evening because she is coming to the city for the VanHalen concert. (which I had a chance to get tickets to, but couldn't because they were a bit out of my price range at the moment... and that's another pisser!) I might use that to get out of the date, because I really don't see this Phil thing going anywhere... But if the date starts off well enough, then I think Alana would understand if I spent the evening seeing where that goes. She's awesome like that!
 
Side note: Since I had a job for another week, I'll do the Columbia rant THIS WEEK... IT WILL BE UP BEFORE I GO HOME!

HOLY COW... LIFE IS GOOD! This was a truly terrific weekend for the Lizzle! Friday was a quiet night in because I knew I had my last day of work on Saturday. Work went well, and I came home, got a nap in and got ready for a fun night. Alana came into the city, and so me, Jen, Ben and Spoolie (Lana-mama) drank heavily here for a few hours, and then Ben left to go to some party off the blue line, and we three ladies went down to southport. We went to Cullen's and Blue Bayou, had a few rounds, and went to Wrigleyville where we started a round, and Jennie started feeling bad. The plan was for us to follow Jennie out the door once we finished our round, but Alana wanted to dance, so we danced, and Jennie couldn't find us, so she left. Alana and I danced for a while, I found a boy to dance with, and kiss, so it was worth sticking around. (Speaking of that boy, I think he broke some kind of boy-law, because he called me today... And I thought it was against the rules for boys to call girls the next day.) And at some point I did drunk-dial Nate. So anyway, Alana and I ended up walking home... Yes, we walked all the way from Wrigley to my apartment! We were joined by some weird little Mexican guy, who didn't speak the best of english, and I didn't remember his name more than 5 seconds after he left us. But we got home a little after 3 and all in all it was a really good night out. I got up this morning to see my Spoolie off, and then went back to bed for a little bit, got p again, and got ready to go to the game.
 
It was a GREAT day at the ball park, sunny, warm but not hot, a nice breeze blowing in. The seats we had were SPECTACULAR! Only five rows behind home plate... And I got to see my husband pitch, so it was great! The only way it could have been better is if it had been a win. But it was still a GREAT day at the ballpark! I came home and took a nice nap, and got a call from Phil (the guy from the bar) and he wants to go out sometime this week, so that's a bonus! That pretty much wraps things up in a tidy little bow.
 
Here are some really great quotes of the day:
 
QOTD
7.17.04 - "She can ride a pelvis like no other!" ~Ben talking about some girl.
 
7.18.04 - "Or, just shoot it in my face, yeah! That's a new one!" ~ Jennifer (and yes, she was talking about that sexually!)
 
7.19.04 -
Ciara: "Oh it says I need fertilizer for it"
Chris: "You don't need fertilizer... Just poop on it."
 
7.20.04 - "Well, I called him an ass-fucker, but I said it in the most loving ass-fucker way possible" ~Jennie talking about her now homosexual ex boyfriend

I don't know why I even bothered to invite people to contribute on here... Nobody does it. I've gotten like 2 entries out of Dave, but he has since fallen off the face of the planet, and pretty much everybody else has been loafing on the job. Lazy bastards. Am I gonna have to put the smack down on you jack-mo's?
 
As for everything else that's going on at the moment;
I got free books, I need a pedicure, I fully intend to soak my co-workers at work on my last day, Atkins diet still sucks, Alana is gonna come to town to party down, and I'm going to the Cubs game on Sunday (5 rows behind home plate!!!) HOOOOOOOORAAAAAAAY! Life is good.
 
 
QOTD
7.16.04 - "What can I say? I get drunk, I get naked!" ~ Jennifer.

Well good evening all, after being without internet access for the better part of 3 days (which is maddening for someone like me, who has a very serious internet addiction,) the internet is FINALLY back on! In the meantime, my few loyal readers have called in complaints of going through blog withdrawal. (My own mother called in a complaint, despite talking to me on the phone every day... ) What can I say to that?  I don't know... But I'm back now, so take a couple of deep breaths to calm down and compose yourself. It's all going to be ok. I PROMISE. So the last few days have treated me kindly.  I had Monday, Tuesday, and today off! It has afforded me some time to go to the beach, shop, and paint (three things that you all know I LOVE!!)  I also took some time out to schedule my trip home, scheduled my visit with Cousin Tarreck (and scheduled in a Cubs game!) and found out that I'm going to be an aunt again! My oldest sister is preggers again! YAAAAAY!
 
 So tomorrow is Friday, which means it's pay day, and almost my last day of work! Yep, that's right, Saturday is it for my flower slingin' days this summer! So Saturday night we're celebrating! Alana will be in town, Ben will be coming over, Jen will be around, and I'll see if Nate-y-kins and company would be willing to try again at that rockstar effort. (This will only fuel the rumors of my attempts at boss seduction, I'm sure, but I'll risk it!) 
 
During the internet outage, we also saw the this year's Midsummer Classic... Better known to the masses as the MLB All Star Game! The AL with their Yankee-fied manufactured team won the rights to home field advantage over the real players of the NL. I guess I should mention that Bill Simmons wrote an article singing the praises of Houston... Yes, that's right! He hated it only a few short months ago, and now he loves it... I guess that's what a Superbowl win will do for you. Here's a link to the full article, but I'll just give you my favorite part here: "One other highlight: When Sarah Silverman was asked the old, 'All right, if you could make out with anyone playing in the game, who would it be?' question, she glanced around and saw [Matthew] Modine, Charlie [Maher] (Bachelorette reject), [Nick] Lachey and the Apprentice Guy, finally answering, 'I guess Ernie Banks.' These are the moments that should make the actual telecast." I should actually warn you, you won't really see a lot of the comedy in this article unless you have a basic knowledge of the old-school baseball players.
 
As for today, I slept in, went to the beach, came home and worked out, showered, napped, read, and watched my Cubbies cruise to victory over the Brewers. Laughed at some Craig Counsell batting, and as an important side note, I'll say that we are very troubled over the loss of Mark Prior, this time for elbow discomfort. Kyle also had a spotty inning with a sterling finish. That hippie needs a haircut like it's nobody's business though! He's not quite to Johnny Damon status of needing a haircut, but still...
 
Well, that's the recap for now... So here's the quote of the day!
 
QOTD
7.15.04 - (I had just finished answering a customer's question)
"Hey, uhh... Was he a he?" ~Chris K.
 

Happy Homerun Derby day!!!

Went shopping with C today out at Old Orchard (never a cheap trip) But anyway... C is uber-excited about getting her new laptop, and tomorrow I'll be painting... Putting final touches on the Faith project. It's a sad way to spend the day, but it's an act of love. As for everything else, Jennie's doing something illegal at work... But we don't know what it is or why, Alana is considering coming to the city this weekend to party, and Ben is less than 2 weeks away from being 21. That's the daily status update.

QOTD -
7.13.04 -
Liz: "Yeah, C, I'm practicing the fine art of boss-seduction"
C: "Yeah well, it's not a skill that everyone has... You've just got your hand in the right pocket!"

7.14.04 - "whoa! My butt is vibrating!!!" ~C

Baseball fans will understand why this gets it's own entry:


HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA
GRIFFEY TORE HIS HAMSTRING!
BAAAAAAHHHHHH HA HA HA HA HA!

Well well well... Welcome back to the Happy Hour, children! I hope that everyone else had a stupendous weekend. I know I did. Friday night was a pleasant night in, time to watch a couple movies, paint, etc. I stayed up late to work on the Faith project, and got up to go to work on Saturday. C had a headache, so I had the joy of the old commute on the train and the bus. I arrived at Evanston, and within 10 minutes, we were done, so we went out to the Virus (Niles West) and we kinda putzed around until lunch time. While at lunch, Nate called, convinced that we were deliberately avoiding him... After missing him once again at lunch time (which only fueled his suspicions of avoidance) we met up at Niles and got some actual work done. About that time C showed up because she was just THAT BORED. We had some laughs, made Chris crazy for a little bit, found out that Nate apparently does not have a bellybutton, and at 3:30 I took off. I ran to Jewel for some liquor, took a shower, and got a nap in, so I could be fully charged for the impending night out. Jennie and company went out to dinner, C crapped out on us to go and do RA stuff, and I waited for Nate... And then I waited some more... And when I thought I was done waiting, I waited some more. Things being the way they are in Alabama, and getting a rather grim update didn't improve my mood and desire to go out. But after a couple of phone calls, it was time for me to get out to the bar, and get drinkin! After completely missing the free beverages at HiTops, Nate magically appeared and we all met up at Barleycorn's. (Apparently SOMEONE forgot to set an alarm, and didn't even wake up until 9:45) In spite of the late start, we still had a very good time. After several rounds, and lots of laughs, we were of the opinion that it was time to move on. So we walked down to O'Hagans, but decided to forego O'Hagans and go to some other place down on Belmont. We had a round, and someone decided that we needed to go get some food. So we walked down to Clark's and as soon as they were ready to seat us everyone crapped out on us, so Nate and I were the only ones left, but we had a decent meal, and a nice conversation, and at about 3 we decided to call it a night. It wasn't a rockstar effort, but still a very good time! High quality all around.

I'm going to steal Jennie's Brian!! He's a doll!

QOTD
7.11.04 -
Bret: "Hey Liz, can I call you Jiz?"
Liz: "Yeah, you can call me Jiz, but only if I get to call you Bertie"
Bret: "Bertie? That means I get to call someone else TALKIE! We're quite a group, Jiz, Talkie and Bertie!"

7.12.04 - "Here, hold my wallet and my keys, I'll hold my boobs and run!" ~Jennifer

Work today was a riot. Very little actual work was done, but there was a lot of laughter. The highlight of the day came pretty late when we were out at Niles (also known as "The War Zone") after significant rain impeded our efforts, we elected to make signs and such to pass the time. So when the time came to put the signs up, Nate climbed up on the racks, and put the tape on his bottom lip so that he could use both hands to put the sign up... While this doesn't seem nearly as funny in print, seeing a guy with a large roll of tape dangling from his bottom lip actually is quite amusing. As if I was not already amused enough, the time came for Nate to use the tape and he tried to pull it off. This presented a bit of a problem. As he began to peel the tape off, panic set in. Nate's bottom lip is coming down, his eyes are bugging out, and the laughter begins. By the time I realize that he has pulled off part of his lip, drawn blood, and is apparently very near being in tears, I am literally on the floor, rolling with laughter, laughing so hard I'm crying and nearly wetting my pants! I had to apologize later for laughing at the poor guy because he was in pain, and he did draw blood.

I think I'm forgiven. And if I'm not forgiven today, then tomorrow I will be for sure, because he's coming over for a few rounds on Winona, and then we're going out to get obliterated. I look forward to these things. (I look forward to them quite a lot!) The down side to today was that the idiots at Home Depot-Evanston sold my orchid, even after I expressly told them that I was coming back for it, and I put it inside the cash register kiosk. BASTARDS! And the true low point of the day came just after work when I got a call from Ashlei. All was going well, and then she dropped the bomb on me. She is not returning in the fall. Instead she will be going to Bowling Green. This makes me very very sad. We will miss her immensely. It would have been easier to take if there had been some kind of indication that she was even thinking about transferring, and if she had told me sooner after the decision was made. I understand and accept that her happiness comes first, but that doesn't mean that we won't miss her like the dickens. Fortunately she will be visiting next weekend, and several more times throughout the coming year if all goes according to plan.

Poor Faith's condition has been rapidly deteriorating, so the need to get to work on the painting has become greater than ever. (That is, in fact, how I'm spending my evening tonight) I also have other projects lined up for my brother, my oldest sister Becky, Mark, Rachel, my mom, and one for the new apartment... So with that laundry list of things to work on, I better get going on those! You kids behave and I'll let you know how things go.

QOTD
7.10.04 - "Well if it hasn't already happened, you will lose every remaining ounce of respect once we go out drinkin' on Saturday." ~Nate

This week has been pretty quiet, I get up, I go to work, I sling flowers, I come home, I eat some dinner, watch the Cubbies, catch the 10PM SportsCenter, the 11PM airing of the Sunday night sex show, and go to bed so that I can do it all again. That's pretty much it. As a pleasant change of pace, the plan for tonight was to have dinner, chill for a bit and then go out for drinks with Nate, Shannon, and Dustin, but things didn't pan out, so we'll just have to drink at hi-tops on Saturday. (For those of you who are interested in attending the VIP party Saturday night, contact me for details.) As for Friday, I wanna see Anchorman, so if anyone is up to an evening at the movies, give me a call or an IM to let me know. Anyway, life is pretty monotonous (but delightfully so) at the moment, so I'll give you the quotes of the day for yesterday, today, and tomorrow, and let that be that.

QOTD
7.7.04 - "Yeah well I finally got so bored that for the last hour or so I've been sitting here actually talking to the snoods." ~The Admiral

7.8.04 - "I HAVE GAS!" ~Ciara

7.9.04 - "Yeah, well I have to admit that now that I think about it, when I did it, it was mildly arousing!" ~Kirsten on wiping her ass with her March madness 2004 bracket.

I'm glad that I didn't immediately launch a personal attack on Erin and Emily yesterday evening like I really wanted to. Because today I gave it some thought, and you know what, it's not worth it. I had a conversation with Erin yesterday evening that informed me that the away message she had up was not about me, but based on the rest of that conversation, it might as well have been. Basically she informed me that it was obvious that we were not friends anymore, even while we were living together. (This actually was news to me) Yes, it was obvious that we were not close friends, but I'd still have called both of them friends. And while I have thought better of it all, and have decided I am not going to launch a personal attack on here and hash out all my grievances, I will say that I put forth a consistent effort to better our friendship, but was so consistently rebuffed that it became quite obvious that they were not interested in being better friends with me. But still, that's not what this is about. This entry is to announce that there is no real animosity here, and what happened, happened. It was all just a lot of the same petty bullshit that happens to other people every day when they live together. It's not going to benefit any of us to air things out on here, and it's not worth it to me to be petty and catty over things that are already history. I'm going to let bygones be bygones, and drop the matter. I think they are both talented, intelligent girls, and I wish both of them the best... In the words of Forrest Gump, "That's all I have to say about that."

The Columbia rant will still go up as originally planned. It will consist of basic gripes about the old apartment, and landlady, not about the roommates. Plan on seeing it either this weekend, or early next week.


QOTD
7.6.04 -
Liz: Well, generally, if anything goes wrong, I blame you.
Nate: You blame me?
Liz: Yeah, it's because things here are usually your fault.
Nate: yeah, well, I've come to the conclusion that pretty much everything REALLY IS my fault anyway, so that actually works out quite well.

I could be totally off base here, and it might just be my own paranoia, but I think that my last blog entry might have pissed off my old roommates. The reason I think this is because when I came home from Alana's party today, I see that Erin's (my old roommate's) away message reads as follows:
"...(in case you read this) do you honestly think you're that GREAT of a person? like you have AAANY room to bitch and complain...i'm so curious as to what you tell your friends because lord knows when we were your friends you LIED about 3/4 of the shit you bitched about to us. Thats okay though...its no surprize that you're not the bigger person to admit to the truth and keep your lies to yourself...hey, whatever makes you come out to look like the better person right, you Mother Theresa, you! The people who were actually there know the truth anyway"

I don't know for sure, but after re-reading my last entry, and seeing this message, I'm led to believe that it's probably about me. I could be wrong, but I doubt it. If the message is directed at me, then I find this rather amusing, because (A)I haven't even put up the official Columbia rant, which WAS going to be entirely about the apartment, the neighbors, and the landlady, (B) I REALLY don't know what it is that I'm supposedly lying about 3/4 of the time, because I really didn't talk to my old roommates much at all (generally limited to exchanges of about 4 sentences on a daily basis) and if I ever did bitch to them, it would have been about people that they didn't even really know, and (C)Half of the things I said in the last entry had nothing to do with the Columbia rant anyway, they were instead tangential references to a rant I had a couple months about about a cheese sandwich, and a rant that I haven't even begun to compose yet (which has nothing to do with the former roommates), because I don't see a need for it. I was not even going to start in on personal attacks, but if YOU want to make it personal, then FINE. THE GLOVES CAN COME OFF ANY TIME YOU WANT, SWEETHEART! You want to talk about the truth, then the truth is what will come out, because this indirect "if you read this" putting-it-out-there-but-not-putting-a-name-to-it horse shit is for the birds! You don't want to start, because this is a marathon I'm very capable of winning. And I don't even want to see that Mother-Theresa-I'm-better-than-you-but-I'll-be-a-martyr-crap, because I've never made myself out as a anything of the sort. And if I'm wrong then I'll say it.

While the message might not have been about me, I doubt it. If I'm way off base here, I'm sorry.

I had a great time at Alana's (even though her dad thinks I'm a lesbian, and makes fun of me for being a hoosier.) We ate good food, drank good drinks, talked a lot of shit, played a lot of Bacci, and watched as the Cubs swept the Sox... Beautiful.
Thanks Alana-mama and family for a terriffic time!


Other than that, I'll just say I'm irritated... and we'll get into why a little later.

7.5.04 -
Larry: "Hey, what are you doing over there?"
Liz: "I'm sitting over here on your couch, watching some SportsCenter and trying to hear it over you loud asses."
Larry: "You know, you're going to make some poor son of a bitch a very good wife."

After a long day at work, it's been a quiet Saturday night in for the Lizzle. Jennifer left to go visit Nicole, and so I was kind of left to my own devices. So what did I do? I throw a huge 4 kegger in the new apartment! (No, not really, JACKASS!) No, I actually took a nap, had some dinner, and ended up watching a movie with my Mark Joseph... I love him! He's my special boy!

I've received a few complaints about the fact that there is STILL no Columbia rant up... I promise you kids it's coming. I PROMISE! I have one more week of working as a flower slinger, and then I've got all kinds of time to work on it. The more I think about it, the better this rant gets though. It'll happen, just give me time. I think it has taken me living in my new place for a while to realize just how bad things had gotten on Columbia. I guess I had forgotten how awesome college living could be, so I was fine with being miserable. But alas, misery no longer! Jeebus, I'm not getting into this now, I don't have the time, and I'm not presently of the inclination to put real effort into it. And as we all know, this is not the kind of thing that I want to half-ass. My rants are glorious and legendary for a reason. (People are still talking to me about the cheese sandwich-spaghettio rant! Which I'm going to have to revisit in the not too distant future because... Well... I'll just say I can see this one coming from a bit of a distance... And it ain't gonna be pretty when it goes down.) I think things are getting to the point where I'm going to have to stop being vague and just lash out and make direct personal attacks on people. I guess people are not perceptive enough to realize when they are the ones doing all the shit that I'm ranting about. Stupid sons of bitches!

Happy fourth of July, kiddies!

QOTD
7.4.04 - "I'm getting all hairy! I'm getting hairs on my chest... I'm getting hair on my nipples! I have hairy nipples! I have to shave my nipples!" ~Mark on becoming a big boy!

Dave made his return. Huzzah!

C will get a kick out of the fact that I went out with Jen, and of all the guys in the city of Chicago, and of all the names those guys could have had, while I was at Cullen's I got kissed by a not-altogether-attractive guy named Phil. (And this IS funny.) Alana can also appreciate that I saw Eric playing at one of the bars that we went to, and it wasn't Irish oak, Cullen's, or blue bayou... So it was somewhat unexpected.

I am a drunk ass.

7-2-04. HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAD.

QOTD
-
"What's the worst that could happen? You'd see my Kooch? WOO! (as she moons me) ~Jennie trying to justify the lingerie

Hail Liz!

Long time no see and i'm sorry for that. I'm going to NYC again this weekend and this time I'm taking a couple friends. So expect pictures'n'stuff when i return. Love ya babe. Have a happy 4th everyone!!! :) oh and don't do anything i would do... really... i'm not smart

QOTD
7.2.04 -
Nate: (sarcastic) Yeah, I was thinking of pairing you and Megan up, and letting you two go around to the other stores together, since you're best friends now...
Liz: Yeah, if you did that to me, I'd have to slit my wrists.
Nate: Funny, that's probably what Megan is doing as we speak.

I miss Dave. A lot! Maybe some day I'll get him back, but right now, Johns Hopkins has him, and I guess they need him more than I do.

We went to Niles for work today. Fortunately Megan and Bob had the day off. But as of Saturday, they are done for the season, so when we're rolling around next week, we won't have to deal with them, and that's nice.


QOTD
7.1.04 - (in a deep voice and a thick Russian accent) "You strong! Like bull!" ~C, admiring my cart wrangling at Niles

C sliced up her heel at work today, a little bit of blood, and a whole lot of comedy. But I will say this, NO MORE SNS FOR LUNCH... EVER. On the whole, it was a good day though. Lots of watering, lots of chatting. I'm also pleased to announce that since I rock, and the girls I work with rock as well, we get to keep our jobs while everyone else gets the axe... and that's nice! I got a call today from Nate to let me know that if we were interested, we will get to keep our jobs, and roll around to the other stores to clean things up on a daily basis, we'd get to stay on, after eveyone else is told that there are no hours left. But we're keeping it on the DL because everyone else thinks that NOBODY has any hours... We're so awesome!

QOTD
6.30.04 - "Yeah, I was sweeping, and I just happened to turn, and I saw it... Doug's butt crack! And not two minutes later, he tried to tell me he had no butt and no hips, and I was so ready to say, 'well then what was that?'" ~ Chris talking about seeing Porkchop's bottom.