Why do we do this to ourselves? How is it possible that there are places out there who don't participate in daylight savings time while some places do? How does that impact time zones? Do I need a time machine when travelling between time zones during daylight savings? Where does that hour go? What the hell is the point of taking an hour off in the fall and adding an hour in the spring? Who thought this was a good idea? What sadist thought, "Hey, I don't like staying on a consistent sleep schedule! Let's fuck it up for half of the people twice a year!"
I don't like daylight savings time... to me its a bunch of bunk.
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A few words on commercials:
Yeah, I understand that advertising revenues generated from commercials are what keep the programs we love at least partially funded enough to keep them on the air, but we need to talk about a few of the real gems that are presently gracing our airwaves.
- First off, with the joy that is March madness upon us, I must address the ugly subject that is advertisments featuring Coach Mike Krzyzewski (I make no assumptions about my readership, and so for those of you not familiar with this character, and in that case likely unfamiliar with men's college basketball in general, this is how you spell that name you hear which is pronounced "Sha-shef-ski" He is also known as Coach K.) So, basically this guy gets a huge salary for being a really good basketball coach. I do not begrudge him that. I do however take offense to constantly seeing him augment his already ridiculous salary with appearances in multiple commercials, hawking everything from cars to credit cards. Hey, Coach K, maybe if you spent a little more time on the practice court with your team instead of filming TV commercials, you'd find yourself and your team making the final four next year.
- I actually saw a commercial for something that very closely resembled a get rich quick scheme... I've gotten used to these, but I was amazed at the audacity of this one because a character in the commercial ACTUALLY SAID "This isn't a get rich quick scheme, but that's exactly what I did!" If this doesn't set off a few mental alarms in the consumerist American public, I don't know what will.
- If we were to tape a selection of commercials from present day television and look at it some time in the distant future, everyone watching would undoubtedly be convinced that every man watching TV suffered from erectile dysfunction. ENOUGH WITH THE VIAGRA, CIALIS, and all those other knockoffs already! As if I don't get enough spam in my e-mail about this?
- It's the same story with herpes! We get it! You are good looking, you frequently ride horses on the beach, you describe your life as vibrant and incredible, and from time to time you have burning, scabby, painful genitals. Congratulations. You're in a commercial that advertises the fact that you were an indiscriminate slut who would sleep with anything that moved, and you're paying for it for the rest of your life. Way to go! Really!
- While we're on the subject of pills, can we address all the diet pills being advertised? Why yes we can, because this is my page, and my rant, and I say it's ok! People, stop buying into the idea that pills can make you skinny. Instead, how about you turn off the tv, get your ass off the sofa, and jog on a treadmill? I'm not trying to say I'm the skinniest or most physically motivated person in the world. Far from it. But I can say that I have never bought into the idea or relied on a pill to do what my lazy ass wasn't willing to do otherwise.
- Moving away from the pill craze, let's talk about the commercial I've seen numerous times encouraging me to visit Busch Gardens in Tampa, Florida. This commercial opens with a family on the beach, having a grand ol' time, when all of a sudden a girraffe comes walking out of the ocean, much to the kids' delight. I have two problems with this commercial.
- GIRRAFFES DO NOT LIVE IN THE OCEAN... this makes me question the expertise of the fine people working at Busch Gardens. If you can't figure out what kind of environment a girraffe lives in, I sure as hell am not going to trust you with my life by allowing you to strap me into a roller coaster that goes through the (apparently ocean-dwelling) girraffe's habitat.
- If I was a kid on the beach, and I saw a girraffe coming out of the ocean, headed straight for me, I sure as hell would not be delighted about it. I would promptly shit my pants and run away before the crazed seaweed-munching girraffe had a chance to trample my ass!
- I also dislike seeing commercials for movies LOOOOONG before they are due to come out. George Lucas, over a month and a half in advance is WAY too soon to be promoting your movie. The last two star wars movies were awful, (from what I heard, because I sure as hell didn't waste my time or money on them,) and it won't shock me when this one comes out and sucks ass too. The only people who care enough about your movie to want to see a trailer a month and a half in advance have already tracked down the trailer online... and half of them already have a bootleg copy that someone pirated and leaked on Kazaa. So stop wasting my time. PLEASE.
- I'm going to close this rant out on a sad note. It really is a sad day when I turn on the TV and see Darius (Hootie) Rucker hawking burgers for Burger King. Burger King ain't exactly the fast food powerhouse it once was... especially now that they've been at least partially bought out by Chicken Delights. And to see a grammy winning artist belting out a tune for Burger King... Just so sad.
QOTD
4.5.05 - "We just killed a rat and disposed of it ourselves! We are badasses! I could really go for a Miller High Life right now!" ~Sarah V.
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