Speechless... (It happens, just not very often.)

If you keep up with the blog on a daily basis, you already know based on the information contained in the post below that Dave has returned. (This was not a triumphant return, but rather a "slink in through the back door with my tail between my legs" return.) And while normally I would be thrilled at the return of my long lost friend, strangely enough, at this exact moment, I actually find myself kinda pissed off.

Why am I pissed? Because when I saw my blog open before me with a post which I had not composed my heart leapt. I read through the post and noted that in the opening lines Dave wanted me to call him... something I said I wouldn't do, after the "I give up" period. This was especially important to me because I am in my particularly unrelenting phase right now, and calling him meant that I was the one to give it up... Basically it was not on my terms, and it was not what I wanted to do. But my dear sweet mother noted that he was the one to reinitiate contact, so I did in fact relent. I called. I was disappointed with what I heard.

You know how when you were in high school and you screwed up, your parents said "I'm not mad, I'm just disappointed." And how that hurts you more, knowing they are disappointed? You'd almost rather have them be mad, right? Well, I'm mad and disappointed. It's not out of a desire to be more or less hurtful, it's just how I feel. This boy who I sincerely, yet 100% platonically love, disappears without explaination, rhyme, or reason, and after a few months he comes back with "I have no good reason so I'm not even going to try to explain" ?? HONESTLY?? That's all I get? After months of LITERALLY checking the online edition of the Baltimore Sun for obituaries to make sure he didn't die some horrible unspeakable death that I would never know about, that's all I get? (AND YES, I REALLY DID CHECK OBITUARIES DAVID.)

I'm not going to get into the rest of the details here, because that's for me and Dave to hash out... Suffice it to say, I was right... and I have never been more pissed off about being right about something in my life.

I don't want to be mad about this... this is something that should make me happy. My friend found his way back! We'll just have to see how it all plays out.

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QOTD

4.4.05 - "Liz! I woke up this morning, and I was walking around my apartment, and I found all these condescending post-it notes... Apparently I like them enough to write them to myself!" ~Turkey Lurky Cakes.