Interview Day

Yeah, I had an interview today... Anthony had one too. We called each other after we were both done, and compared notes.

The conclusion of both interviews: Interviewing is BULLSHIT.

I think Anthony's was probably more bullshit than mine, but even mine was chock-full-o-bull.

The establishment that I interviewed at today was a place called Twin Anchors... I'd say it's classier than Louie's without any doubt, but I think that Louie's was likely to be busier. For the most part, the questions were your general run of the mill interview questions. You know the kind... "What characteristics do you posses that would make you a good bartender?" or "Why did you decide to go into bartending?" and "How do you make a martini, a cosmopolitan, and a margarita?" I thought all of those made enough sense, and were appropriate...

But then I got other questions like "What would you do if someone didn't tip you well?" to which I responded, "Assume the person is a bad tipper and not let that ruin my day." Because the fact is that there really isn't shit that you can do... You can't force bitches to part with their money.

And then I got "What would you do if a person was rude to you?" to which I responded "Kill them with kindness, and if that doesn't work, just assume they're having a bad day and stay away from them as much as possible." Once again, there really isn't anything that you can do... You can't force someone to be nice to you. (Shit, if I knew how to do this I'd use it on the men and have my ass a sugar daddy instead of a bartending job!)

These are bullshit questions because you're GOING to have rude people and bad tippers no matter what you do... Those bitches are everywhere.

I would have less of a problem with these questions ordinarily, but the guy clearly stated that the bartenders stay pretty busy, so it's not like I'm going to have a whole lot of time to spend focused on any of that mess anyway. THAT'S why those are bullshit questions.

I'll give the guy credit though, that bitch didn't give anything away. I have no idea whatsoever how he thinks I did in that frickin interview... Reading him was like reading a closed book.

Anthony's interview seemed even worse than mine though.

He was at a bar down in Boystown, and even from his recounting of the interview, it was clear that the guys who were opening this bar didn't know shit about the bar business. These guys were clearly "Business school" types who know how things should work in theory, but who have no clue about actual bar practice. (I get a sneaky feeling that this bar won't be around too terribly long.) Especially when they reacted the way that they did when Anthony apparently informed them how exactly they could check to see if bitches were stealing from them... (It ain't like that shit is rocket surgery.)

Basically these bitches were a bunch of jack-offs who don't know what's really going on.

There are days when I think I should just run off and join the circus. I could totally be a lion tamer! (My luck though I'd end up like Roy Horn... You know the bitch that got mauled and disfigured by his tiger!) I guess as long as I don't get eaten or crushed by the animals, and I'm not shoveling elephant poo, I'll be fine.

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QOTD

"Some of the questions I got, I was like wait a minute, are you interviewing me to be a bartender, or to diffuse the atomic bomb?" ~Anthony.

Anthony: "Well, fuck me."
Liz: "Honey, you're not into that."
Anthony: "Girl what are you talking about? Get me drunk enough, I'd do just about anything... Oh hell, who am I kidding? I don't even need to get drunk for that shit!"