Friday, August 26, 2005

I'm gonna be honest here...

I think that we are all internally programmed to like certain kinds of music. This inherent internal programming is then further shaped, honed, and refined over time, with exposure and repetition.

I think this inherent internal programming exists because despite the environmental factors that increase repetition to certain artists and kinds of music, you can still find people who are mysteriously attracted to certain genres or artists that have no play and no place in any part of their environment. In fact, I think it's safe to say that EVERYONE who ever knowingly listens to music has at least one artist, or genre, or something that doesn't seem to fit with the rest of their overall musical-preference-scheme. Think about that. You know you've got one. ...Hell, look at yourself. You're probably a closet-Michael Bolton-fan. (Don't worry, I won't rat you out to all your "cool friends" ... But don't worry too much, those bitches you're looking up to, they totally rock out to that hoser Yanni, and Zamfir -Master of the panflute, so you're ok!)

I don't know where I was going with this, but it all I know is I don't know why I ever liked the song "Lemon" by U2. ...That song is exactly what it advertised, one giant lemon.


I happened across a post from a friend of mine who noted that he recently went to a knob store.

Yes, you read that right. A knob store.

As in a store dedicated solely to the sales and service of knobs.

Such a place does exist, and I want to go there... Just to see an entire store who's overhead (and apparently profit margin) is generated entirely by KNOBS.

Frickin amazing.


Now onto the real business at hand.

I started my new job on Wednesday night. That's why you bitches are here, isn't it? You were dying to know how the first night on the job was, and since I didn't post yesterday, you're back! (MUAH HA HA... You see how I generate interest by keeping you all in suspense!)

As for holding you in suspense, and trying to generate more interest where only a minimal amount existed before, you can't very well hold it against me... I was grumpy when I was unemployed, and when I get grumpy the writing suffers (*SERIOUSLY SUFFERS) and when the writing suffers, and there is little mirth and merriment to be had for anyone, and accordingly the readership gets bored and goes elsewhere for entertainment... And I can't say that I blame them. I don't wanna read about grumpy unemployed bitches either. So when the writing improves, I've gotta hold out for a couple days, stretch things out in order to generate a little bit more buzz and interest among the rather modest readership. You can't blame me really, in typical bartender fashion, I'm just doing whatever I can to keep you bitches coming back for more.

So. Anyway. Wednesday night was training night. The first couple hours were a little hairy as I was still getting the layout of the coolers down and trying to figure out the cash register system... Let me just say that once I got the hang of those two things, the night went quite well.

It was considered a "slow night" for us, and I still did reasonably well tip-wise, so I'm declaring it a training success. The boss liked how I operated,especially considering it was only my first night, and I enjoyed myself immensely.

Basically, I've decided I really like my new job, and I think I made a wise decision getting into this line of work. (Though being a "night person" the hours alone are reason enough to keep me in the industry!)

Wednesday was the beginning of another symbiotic relationship at Louie's pub in addition to my joining those already on staff. Yes, we at Louie's Pub now proudly sponsor a men's beer league baseball team. They are now known as the Louie's Pub Aquamen. They are all in their mid 20s, and they are all pretty damn good looking if I do say so myself. (*Side note - I was not at all opposed to the fact that the team captain had to take all of their jerseys so that our pub logo could be added before their next game, so at one point in the evening, my bar was full of strapping, fit, shirtless guys in their 20s... Nope, not opposed to that at all... God, now that I look back on that, I think I need a cigarette... And I don't even smoke.)

So in case you couldn't tell, I think I have found the calling of my 20s, and even though it doesn't really prepare me for much more in the way of "real-world-applicable" skills, it's a nice way to pass the time. Besides, I gotta do something to pay off my undergrad loans before I can worry with grad school nonsense, right? (*Contrary to what my dad would have people believe, I don't think this is my LIFE'S CALLING... And I don't plan on doing this until the day I die.) I just know that I am not mentally ready to spend my days in an office cubicle just yet... Lest I turn into a real life character vaguely resembling "Milton Waddams" from the brilliant film Office Space.

Now that I think about my parents, and my job, I am kind of amused that my mom can now easily answer that ever-so-frequently-asked question "So what are the kids up to these days?" with three little words.

"They are bartenders."

That's all she's got to say, because both of us now make our living by being purveyors of alcohol.

We are a skilled bunch... And now that I get to thinking about that, my mom has been able to answer that question in three words before. The answer used to be, "They are lifeguards."

So I guess I have once again followed in the footsteps of my big bro, right into a job that in no way prepares me for the eventuality of the real world, or gives me desirable skills that future employers will be looking for (aside from further developing my already keen people-skills).

Thanks bro! CHEERS!



Anthony: "You're looking very Burberry today, I like it."
Caro: "Oh thanks, this is my 'Charlotte' outfit."
Anthony: "I always hated Charlotte."

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