Sunday, September 12, 2004

NOW THAT'S WHAT I CALL ENTERTAINMENT!


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I will go ahead and apologize in advance for the lack of stellar humor in this post, if only because I killed some of the funnier brain cells last night by drowning them in large quantities of alcohol... I promise to make it up to you soon by training other brain cells to take over the more comedically-proficient writing of the future.

Friday was a very nice day. I got out of stats early, which means I only spent about 25 minutes in the forced-company of my horrid professor, as opposed to the normally-allotted 50 minutes... So that's a good thing. And I had lunch with Alana, and that's ALWAYS a good thing. I went into work, and found that I did in fact have a paycheck waiting, and that I didn't have to actually stay and work... so that's quality. I didn't go out on Friday night, because I knew I had to get up entirely too early to go sling flowers.

So Saturday comes and I go sling flowers for a rather enjoyable 10 hours and get some really GREAT quotes of the day, one of which will undoubtedly never be uttered in any real context ever again. So after work, both Phil and Alana wanted to go out, so I decided to go out with Alana and call Phil so he'd know where to meet up with us if he wanted to.

We started out as a large group at Sheffield's which was eventually reduced to four, and those of us who stuck around had plenty to drink there. So after numerous rounds we went to Trader Todd's where I had more to drink and somehow acquired an inflatable pink saxophone. I also fucked with the head of a girl in the midst of her bachelorette party... I am probably solely responsible for whatever cold feet she will experience on her wedding day, because I'm an evil woman who planted the seeds of doubt. (Yup, I'm still hell-bound.) We then moved on to Boar's Head where the group was whittled down to just me and Alana. Of course we were hit on by boys, some of them better than others... and by some one in a billion shot, Nate happened to pass by the window of Boar's Head where we were seated. So Nate joined us for a round or two before we all decided to call it a night at roughly 3 AM. We discussed Nate's "Man-period" and Alana kinda beat him up, and in the end we all caught a train and came back to the exposed brick shangri-la that is my apartment, had some pizza, watched half of "The Big Lebowski" and went to bed at around 5:30. (When Chris finds out that Nate slept at my place, I'll never hear the end of it.)

Despite my really high aspirations of cleaning the apartment, Sunday was spent watching excessive amounts of football, baseball, and otherwise nursing a minor hangover. And I must say that the new sheets make nursing a hangover all day a MUCH more pleasant experience.

For your sake more than my own, I'll just wrap this up and post the quotes of the day which were just spectacular.

QOTD
9.11.04 - (Nate was recounting a story of a post-wedding-reception drunken party that he recently attended which was hosted by a 75 year old man named Norm.)
Nate: "Hey, Norm, where's your cat?"
Norm: "What the hell are you talking about, I don't have a cat."
Nate: "Well I was just looking for the cat that shit in my mouth while I was sleeping."

9.12.04 - "Well Norm had a sword collection, so we're a bunch of guys in our mid twenties who are really drunk and so we ask Norm if we can have a sword fight.. and then I hear a sentence that will never be uttered again by anyone. I hear my friend say 'Hey, here, hold my sword while I go tea-bag Cory!'" ~Nate (Though he only gets credit for this one because it was from his retelling of the afforementioned party.)

9.13.04 - "Hey, I like the Backstreet boys, I guarantee that if you listen to their first album you'll find yourself singin' along too!" ~ A straight male I know... I'll protect his anonymity and save him excessive ridicule at the hands of our mutual friends.

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