Can I just plead insanity?

This is one of those mental health posts. It's not my norm here, so feel free to skip.

First things first, I would like to thank all of you for being so supportive. Your positive thoughts on my behalf are very much appreciated.

Secondly, I would like to report the findings of that scientific experiment. As it turns out, cocktails with sympathetic friends is very beneficial to mental health, even if only during the time that is spent directly with them.

What is NOT helpful to a fragile mental state is being stood up by a "friend" who knows about your mental state BEFORE standing you up, and stands you up anyway. Being the forgiving person that I am, I understand if something comes up... What is not cool is that there was no phone call to say that they were not coming, so I am left waiting, feeling like dog shit about my life anyway, only being made to feel worse when coming to the realization that someone I considered a friend didn't think I was worth a phone call even after telling me that they would gladly meet up with me, and was supposedly on the way. That's nice.

Knowing that my readers are supportive of me, and are easily irascible towards those who do me wrong, I know there are those of you who are irate at the thought of my being left waiting by anyone. And part of me certainly does, or did, feel betrayed by that individual, and I definitely went through that feeling of betrayal and anger. And I've gone through feeling like given my current situation, and the long series of events that have comprised my life lately, as though my life is a cosmic experiment on Murphy's Law, but the fact is that I have gotten used to behavior like this from lots of different people. And having repeatedly been exposed to this sort of thing, I know that staying mad about it never does me any good.

And so, in the interest of my mental health, I am dropping the baggage of anger, self-loathing, and self-pity. Those things are a heavy baggage, and I am tired of carrying them. I am laying them down. It takes far too much energy to stay mad. I will maintain my friendships with those that matter, and I will even maintain the friendship with the person who ditched me. I will forgive, but I will not forget. I will not forget being left alone, and I will not forget the kindnesses that have been shown by those who stuck by me. But I've got to keep moving on, because the truth of it is, the sun will go on shining, whether I stay mad and miserable or not... So I'm letting go... If only for my own mental health.