Outfit planning.

Ok, so as you all know, I recently started my new job. A lot of you might even know what that job is... For the rest of you, here's the skinny.

My formal title is "Executive Administrative Assistant" for a prominent real estate firm in downtown Chicago. Personally, the only time I will EVER use the title "executive administrative assistant" is on my next resume... which I'm hoping to not have to construct for some time... So instead, I refer to myself as "the office bitch." Which isn't to say that I'm the bitchiest one in the office... though I think I hold that title too. No being the office bitch means I get to do all the bitch work that the brokers don't want to do... like faxing, mailing, e-mailing, scanning files and converting them into a different format... shit like that.

It's not bad work. It keeps me out of trouble, and the pay is quite nice. So all in all, I'm not going to complain... (Though complaining is fun, so I'm sure complaints will be logged as they arise.) My only problem with the job? The hours. Yes, I know that most of the world operates on a 9-5 schedule, and as a part of the faceless masses of corporate America, I should be too, but it's rough on me!! I'm a night person. Always have been, always will be. So what does conformity to this new schedule mean for Lizzle?

It means she does whatever she can in the evenings to prevent having to get up any earlier than is ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY in order to get ready for work in the morning.

This translates into:

• Showering at night, and going to bed with wet hair so that I don't have to shower and deal with the mop on my head in the morning.
• Planning outfits to wear for the next day so that I am not blearily stumbling into my closet right after I wake up and putting on something that would almost undoubtedly resemble an outfit belonging to my 85 year old grandfather... (who owns some CRAZY stuff and puts it together in the most delightfully unconventional ways.)
• Running to the bank when I get home of an evening to get money to put on my transit card so that I don't have to wait for the bank to open the next morning.

There are other things, like packing a lunch, and other stuff of that nature that I find equally awful in the morning, so I do them at night, but you get the idea. Beating the bejesus out of the construction workers who are building a deck for my neighbors across the alley with a $330 stilletto heel and other things of that nature are sadly activities that can only be done in the morning...

In the words of Chuck Klosterman, (and a great many others who just didn't happen to say it in print,) "I guess I'm just not a morning person."

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Since you all seem to love Caroline so much, why don't you all stop on over and say hello to her on her page, in her comments! She would love it! She thinks that only she and I will ever read her page... With the help of you fine folks, I intend to prove her wrong!