After heavy conversation, my friends do what they can to lift my spirits...

[insert very heavy conversation via IM here]

M: ok, this may put a smile on your face... last night i was chatting with one of my friends on IM i asked him what he had been doing all day. His exact words: "sitting on my dance." i stared at the screen, trying to figure out what that meant
Liz: "sitting on my dance???"
M: maybe he thought his dance was out of control the previous night.
Liz: you didn't ask for an explaination?
M: before i could say anything else, he typed "i have no idea what the hell i meant by that"
Liz: HA HA HA
M: apparently the vodka has the same effect on him as it does on me. i think we need to incorporate this into everyday conversations... like the game with tarreck and jon
Liz: HA HA HA
M: how many times can you get "sitting on my dance" into a convo?
Liz: God I hope Tarreck comes back for another Cubs weekend
M: yes! and let him know that i had ohio state as one of my final four teams. osu let me down... heck, the whole big ten let me down
Liz: they let a lot of us down
M: in other news, i love college boys
Liz: Oh M... You ain't gettin any younger! they can't support you in the lifestyle to which you've become accustomed
M: i know. BUT... i'm trying to diversify
Liz: YOU do not need to diversify.
M: in fact, this past weekend i made out with the lone black kid on the [Men's basketball] team... only four more black kids on campus to go... JUST KIDDING
Liz: M, you made out with literally 50% of the black students on your campus!
M: 20%... ok!
Liz: oh there are 5?
M: yup... all guys
Liz: the other night at dinner you said there were 2
M: i found more
Liz: HA HA HA
M: i'm so horrible!
Liz : No, we're not racist, I mean we embrace diversity... and in your case, you "LOVE"diversity!
M: I DO!! the dutch are ambassadors to the world
Liz: I hope you realize that this conversation will be quoted liberally.
M: as long as it doesn't count as a hate crime
Liz: I think if anything, in your case it could be called a "Crime of passion!"
M: i am pretty passionate about that topic
Liz: what, diversity? or not being prosecuted for hate crimes
M: making out
Liz: thats a good thing to be passionate about if you ask me
M: i'm a fan
Liz: dude, that's like saying I'm a fan of laughing... NOBODY doesn't like it!
M: well, i had to convince this one kid that i'm not a fan of kissing because he wasn't that good of a kisser... ugh. it was one of the hardest things EVER
Liz: well EVERYONE enjoys a good laugh, and EVERYONE enjoys a good makeout... just because not everyone is funny, and not everyone is a good kisser doesn't make it any less of a good thing when done properly
M: very true
Liz: and I think kissing is like art... some people are masterful at it, the Michelangelo's of kissing as it were... and some people have a talent for a very different kissing style.... more like the Jackson Pollock(s) or Pablo Picasso(s) of the kissing world... and then there are those who stick to really bad rudimentary stuff because they never cultivated a talent for it early on.
M: i never made out as a child, but my first kiss was under a bed at the tender age of 4... i can't draw stick people to save my life, but i think i'm a pretty good kisser (is my name going to be quoted in this??) if you use this part...i think you should definitely keep your analogy of artists in the post
Liz: I'm not saying that artistic ability, or the age at which you began making out are relevant... I'm saying that it's a skill thing... and that there are different tastes for different skills out there, and then there are some people who just suck.
M: EXACTLY
Liz: I, of course, am a Michelangelo of the make-out world... As evidenced by the fact that I have REPEATEDLY been told that I am outstanding at it, by multiple independent sources.

[The conversation ends here because M had to leave for a valid reason... but you get the idea.]