I've got a new theory for the sociologists of the world to ponder. Yes, that's right kids, I've had a sociological epiphany! The joys of my theory will resonate in sociology lecture halls for ages to come!

Are you ready for this? I don't think you are! You ready yet? ... How about now? ...Now? Ok. I'll wait....

Ok, ready or not, here goes.

SOCIAL SADISM. Yeah, social sadism.

I'm posting it now because I need to have a date on this idea... I'm seeking a patent for the concept. Want an explaination, do you? Well allow me to enlighten you. Everyone has met someone who they just inexplicably have a deep desire to throw into the path of an oncomming bus. It's a fact that most of us normal folks have come to grips with. And yeah, we all have days where we're being bitchy or annoying, and people want to throw us under a bus, but I'm referring to the people who consistently engage in behaviors which consistently grate on the nerves of those around them on a daily or near-daily basis. It is with these people my theory is concerned.

These horrible, annoying, soulless, morally corrupt, ethically inept, socially unconcerned people are the ones who have been brought up in socially sadistic households. It all begins innocently enough. Parents pamper their kids, (and by pamper, I mean literally spoil the kids,) and teach them that they are better than other people so that the kids grow up, leave the home, and wreak havoc on society. The parents are not abusing the child, and are thus not held accountable for child abuse, but the children grow up to abuse society because they think they are above the rules... Thus, SOCIAL SADISM. The parents have so little regard for the world, and society in general that they see fit to turn loose their miscreant children on the unsuspecting citizens of the civillized world. Now while money has a very strong correlation to socially sadistic households, the socially sadistic do not necessarily need to be wealthy, and by the same token some wealthy kids turn out just fine. Socially sadistic parents need only to lavish their children with attention and praise in all the wrong ways, and this too will teach a child that they are above others in society, thus spoiling them in the literal sense of the word, and in the end there is nothing that the rest of us can do but band together and lobby for more frequent bus service and more lenient laws regarding justifiable homicide.

And with that, I will await my book deal and my praises as one of the greatest sociological thinkers of the modern age... I'll just be sitting here, drinking a few brews, watching the BoSox win the World Series, so please leave gifts of money, reality show contracts, attractive men, fan mail, pleasantly scented candles, and jewelry at the door. Thank you!

This one's for you Kirst! (Bill would be so proud, don't you think?)